Raising boys 7-8 years old. Psychological features of the development of nine-year-old children

Psychologists call the period from 8 to 11 years one of the most difficult. It cannot be called a teenager yet, but children at this age are no longer primary schoolchildren. Due to a number of features of the development of the nervous system in children aged 8-11 years, the behavior of schoolchildren often becomes uncontrollable. It takes a lot of effort from parents to maintain a friendly relationship with their child and at the same time force the student to fulfill his responsibilities responsibly.

Age-related features of the development of the nervous system in children and adolescents

The peculiarities of the neuropsychic development of school-age children cause some concern among parents. This is due to the fact that schooling has entered the life of a child aged 8-11 years. However, you should not be scared or worried that a student is not behaving the way you expect him to behave at school or at home. These are only age-related characteristics, a mandatory stage in a child’s development. The fact that he cannot, for example, concentrate on one task and is distracted does not at all mean that he is incapable of learning and will grow up insufficiently educated.

The development of the nervous system in children and adolescents is very active. The human skull stops growing at about 10 years of age, and further development of the nervous system occurs at the expense of the functional part. The brain is developing intensively, new, more subtle functional connections are being formed between its various departments, which will ensure the perfect functioning of the whole organism. The cerebral cortex is especially actively developing - the part of the brain that is responsible for thinking, perception, behavior control and other higher forms of human brain activity. The weight of a child's brain at this age is almost equal to the weight of an adult's brain. The high excitability of the child’s brain gradually smoothes out, the processes of excitation and inhibition are balanced. Another age-related feature of the development of the nervous system in children 8-11 years old is the accelerated formation of the departments responsible for the child’s motor activity, so his movements become more and more precise and varied. The senses work more precisely, visual, color, and auditory sensations acquire greater clarity.

The mental development of a child aged 8-11 and his perception of the world around him is still imperfect. He perceives objects and phenomena inaccurately, as if incompletely. The child’s attention is drawn to some random signs, bright details, and sometimes there is no complete picture. Parents of children of this age are sometimes surprised by such selective observation. A child may, for example, not remember what color and size the dog was, but he definitely remembers that it had a red leash. Due to the characteristics of the mental development of school-age children, attention at 8-11 years old is involuntary. They are instantly and very easily distracted by any external stimulus. The sound of a siren outside the window, a fly flying into the classroom - and now all the children are distracted from the lesson and are watching the fly or craning their necks, trying to see if an ambulance or fire truck has turned on the siren. Due to their mental development, children aged 8-11 years cannot focus and maintain attention on one object for a long time. During school classes, they get tired by the second or third lesson, and it becomes difficult for teachers to keep their attention.

Extended day groups and classes that are emotionally and cognitively intense also lead to fatigue. This is reflected in their behavior at home when doing homework. Attempts by adults to force a child to concentrate on the task at hand lead to rapid fatigue and are unlikely to have a beneficial effect on his studies. Therefore, parents need to allow their child to periodically take short 10-15 minute breaks.

Features of the development of children 8-11 years old: memory, speech and thinking of schoolchildren

Due to age-related developmental characteristics, the memory of schoolchildren aged 8-11 years is more figurative. They remember the external features of an object better than, for example, their purpose or meaning. When studying a phenomenon, children assimilate it in parts, but a complete understanding of it and the interconnection of its parts often does not develop. When developing memory in a child 8-11 years old, keep in mind that memorization at this age is predominantly mechanical in nature.

Children remember better what made the most vivid impression or was repeated several times. Therefore, the reproduction of educational material by children of this age is less accurate, and the acquired knowledge is often not retained in memory for long, giving way to new, more vivid and fresh impressions.

One of the features of the development of schoolchildren’s thinking at this age is its figurative nature. Children remember better what is accompanied by demonstration of visual material. The perception of complex abstract concepts causes them significant difficulties, since they do not visualize them clearly. In addition, they still do not have enough knowledge about the general laws of natural phenomena and relations in society. Therefore, to develop the thinking of schoolchildren when teaching educational material in class or explaining homework to a child, first of all, clarity and separation of complex concepts into separate components are necessary. The use of play techniques in teaching a child of this age is still relevant and gives good results. The so-called formal-logical type of thinking is gradually being formed, based on reasoning, constructing logical chains, representing not obvious but possible properties of an object or phenomenon, the consequences of a particular action, and not just the visible characteristics of the phenomenon. The development of formal logical thinking is facilitated by the child’s mastery of comparisons, classifications, and the ability to analyze and synthesize information.

The development of a child’s speech at 8-11 years old and his thinking occurs in close interrelation. At this age, children's vocabulary is actively expanding and reaches an average of 4,000 words or more. The important thing is that it is at this age that the child acquires the skills to express his thoughts orally and in writing. School essays are aimed at developing the speech of children aged 8-11 years. The character of a child of this age is unstable, and in general its formation occurs according to the information laid down in preschool age. With defects in preschool education, children often display such negative character traits as rudeness, selfishness, and swagger.

Development of the student’s personality and emotional-volitional sphere

Children aged 8-11 years are very emotional, and emotions are always reflected on their face and behavior. They actively react to current events, their mental and physical activity, and the work of their imagination are always emotionally charged. Due to their emotional development, school-age children do not hold back their feelings and always openly express joy or sadness, fear or dissatisfaction. Children of this age are characterized by frequent mood swings during the day, which reflects their reaction to current events, although in general they are cheerful and carefree. However, displeasure and disagreement can be expressed very violently, albeit briefly, with tears and throwing hysterics. This is especially true for children with the so-called demonstrative personality type. At this age, positive or negative emotions are caused not only by games and communication with peers. Relationships with school teachers and their assessment of the child’s academic success are important and cause certain reactions. At the same time, children are usually indifferent to the feelings of other people; they have not yet developed the ability to empathize (so-called empathy). The development of strong-willed qualities is very active in a child aged 8-11 years, which is facilitated by studying at school. It trains patience, perseverance, discipline, etc. However, the increased emotionality and motor activity of children to some extent prevent this. Some children, especially those who do not receive enough attention from parents and teachers, have a less developed will. This may manifest itself as increased suggestibility and lack of discipline. Due to the age-related characteristics of the emotional development of schoolchildren, they may succumb to the bad influence of their peers or older children, violating discipline and disrupting the educational process in the classroom. Such children should be given increased attention, directing it to the development of strong-willed qualities. It will be easier for the child to overcome the difficulties that arise, feeling the support of adults. But some children can show such qualities only in the presence of adults, trying to earn their favor. The development of the emotional-volitional sphere of a schoolchild by the age of 10-11 is already such that children begin to show volitional activity, guided in their actions by their own motives, and not just the instructions of adults and carrying out their tasks. At first, their volitional efforts extend only to immediate targets. Distant goals require additional intermediate efforts, for which children of this age are not yet ready.

The main features that they acquire are arbitrariness and internal planning of actions, that is, the child no longer runs somewhere, succumbing to a momentary impulse, a fleeting desire. He already knows that there is the word “must”, there are duties that he must fulfill, lessons that he needs to prepare. And he is already learning to plan his time, distribute it between fulfilling his duties and his desires.

Relationships with other people, both adults and peers, are influenced by studying at school, since it changes the child’s lifestyle and forces him to take on certain responsibilities: the need to attend classes, complete assignments, and learn new material. In general, the child’s social circle expands, social behavior skills appear: collectivism, camaraderie, etc. In a team consisting of children of this age, due to the increased development of the emotional sphere of schoolchildren, public opinion begins to form. The child gradually understands the significance of his relationships with others and understands the motives of conflict situations. The opinion of his peers becomes very important to him, and he develops a fear that he may be considered weak, cowardly, or a deceiver. He begins to make sure he looks the part in the eyes of his friends and classmates. Feelings that he had not previously experienced also appear. If a child has achieved more success in something than other children, he has a feeling
superiority over them; if, on the contrary, he failed in something, envy may arise towards those who are more successful or capable.

Another important aspect of the emotional development of a schoolchild’s personality at this age is strong susceptibility to the influence of authority, which is played by an adult who establishes a certain order. It is his requirements that the child strives to meet in detail. The fear of breaking the rules established by the authority and causing his anger leads to the fact that some children become sneaks, closely monitoring not only their own behavior, but also the other children, and noticing all their deviations from the rules. If the child nevertheless violates the established order, he develops a feeling of guilt and shame for his mistake. In general, the child begins to feel differently, already an adult, a responsible person, whose opinion is important to others.

The emotional and volitional development of schoolchildren aged 8-11 years is influenced by the social environment in which they develop (family, teachers, peers), the characteristics of upbringing in preschool age, activity in working on themselves and the desire to meet assigned tasks, and to some extent heredity.

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DEVELOPMENT OF A CHILD 8 - 9 YEARS OLD.

HEIGHT AND WEIGHT.

Over the course of a year, a 9-year-old child will grow by 5-7 cm, gain almost 2 kg, and the chest circumference will increase by an average of 1-2 cm. The pulse rate of an eight-year-old child is 80-85 beats per minute. The important thing is that the elements of the elastic fibers of the skin begin to actively grow.

Boys at age 9 continue to grow faster than girls. They are also slightly ahead of girls in weight until about 8.5 years old, but after that the growth process begins to change.

EMOTIONAL DEVELOPMENT OF CHILDREN 8 - 9 YEARS OLD.

A nine-year-old child tries to do everything quickly: move, eat, read, talk. He likes it when adults pay attention to him as an equal. The child is very interested in human relationships: how and why people are friends, why they judge each other, etc. Children aged eight to nine years old continue to poke their noses into everything: why the lights are on and how the car works, what’s inside the TV and why it’s like that, how exactly it works - there are more questions, and for each the child needs to get the most accurate and comprehensive answer possible .

Relationships with friends now become more important for him than with adults, although at the same time, regardless of whether he is a boy or a girl, an eight-year-old child is more drawn to his mother than to other family members. He is even jealous of his mother for others. Children 8 - 9 years old are very impressionable and too sensitive to criticism, they like to discuss the actions of people they know, as well as their own, they are very aware of their shortcomings, but cannot always cope with them. Sometimes they do not get along well with other children, and from time to time they are aggressive even with their mother. If at this age the child develops normally, he begins to develop a stronger sense of duty and desire for various achievements. His communication skills are already well developed. The child sets himself and tries to solve real problems, his imagination and games are aimed at the active assimilation of objective actions.

The age of 8-9 years (especially for boys) is a period of some inhibition of independent reading, so in no case should you force your son to read. Use cunning. Let your child read books first on the topics that interest him most, and then slowly move on to others. And one more thing: choose books together, especially when buying them in a store.

Nine-year-old children are often keen on collecting: absolutely everything is used - pebbles, stamps, stickers from chewing gum... At the same time, children are extremely pleased not only to collect them, but also to systematically put things in order in their collection.

At the age of eight, sometimes children have a desire to put their things in order as well. For greater convenience, they can stick labels on the drawers of the desk, carefully arrange all the books on the shelf... True, most often order is not maintained for a long time, but the most important thing is the desire for it. Give your child a little time, and then the habit of cleanliness and neatness will become an integral part of her character.

CREATIVITY OF A CHILD 8 - 9 YEARS OLD

Boys of this age have a more developed ability for creative activity. If any new object falls into his hands (especially a toy - at this age children still love to play with them), they come up with new games for themselves, using these objects, as we would say, for other purposes. But the girls follow the beaten path, trying to modify them into well-known games that they have long mastered. If this is a toy saucepan, then you only need to cook food in it, and it cannot turn into, say, a bunker for a secret weapon - most often this is how boys play.

The age of 8-9 years is the time when a child’s creative explorations flourish. During this period, intensive and varied visual arts activities are desirable. This is the so-called schematic stage, where a symbol that can only vaguely resemble an object suits the child quite well. From the age of 9, a child will begin to awaken to a realistic reproduction of objects and phenomena.

PSYCHOLOGICAL DEVELOPMENT OF A CHILD 8 - 9 YEARS OLD

The psychological differences between boys and girls are becoming more and more clear. Boys are more distracted when preparing homework, their opinions are often far from what they should be doing, so they have to be forced to do homework. And that is why they do their homework at home not for an hour and a half, as they should, but 3-4 times longer.

Even if a boy thinks and reasons no worse, or better than a girl, it is more difficult to make him think in class than a girl. The restlessness of boys and their lower ability to withstand static loads is manifested in the fact that they are more likely than girls to violate discipline in class and make too much noise during breaks. It is more difficult to teach a boy to maintain order, especially if you previously paid less attention to it. Boys of this age are much less likely than girls to pay attention to their clothes, except in cases where the features of the clothing offered by adults somehow violate their idea of ​​how a boy should dress. The fact that their clothes are torn or dirty interests them much less than girls.

A characteristic shortcoming of boys is also a lack of responsibility. They worry little or not at all about grades at school, forget that they have homework or do not pay attention to it, because of this, parents often have to find out about their sons' homework themselves. They have less developed perseverance, perseverance, patience, diligence, and accuracy. Boys of this age are more likely than girls to experience mood swings - from excessive self-confidence to an absolute loss of self-confidence.

Boys' vocabulary is significantly larger than that of girls, especially due to the concepts of more distant objects and generalized phenomena. Their vocabulary is dominated by words that convey action, while girls are more prone to object-evaluative words. In their free time, boys like to play sports and outdoor games, while girls like to read, play musical instruments, etc.

At 8-9 years old, a child can already engage in acrobatics, gymnastics, and alpine skiing.

CHILD EDUCATION

JUNIOR SCHOOL AGE:

1) the child is an adult.

An eight-year-old child is already beginning to doubt the correctness of the actions and words of adults. Reasons for disagreement - contradictions in statements: “I read this in a book, but they tell me that it is written incorrectly”, “In one book they say one thing, in another - completely the opposite”, “In class, the teacher says this, but my mother says something else” . Or the inconsistency of these statements with the experience of the child himself: “Why is absolutely everyone sure that this is exactly how it is and no other way, but no one listens to my doubts?”, “I don’t agree when they write incorrectly in books - this does not happen in life and will be can’t”, “Why should I think like everyone else? »

The child is very surprised by the need to prove obvious things to others (and himself). For example, if you ask him whether he really lives, the child will answer, referring to his own experience, that he exists not because adults told him so, but because he moves, thinks, jumps, talks, walks, learns, performs various other actions, can touch and see himself in the mirror, hear a voice.

A child of eight to nine years old develops a critical attitude towards adults and the knowledge received from them. Your own opinion appears, which differs from the opinion of adults. Trust in your own life experience grows - the time comes to “clean” this experience through doubt.

Children of this age are very impulsive and unrestrained; they still cannot and do not know how to independently overcome even minor, in our opinion, difficulties that arise while studying at school. Therefore, at this age, the development of a child’s personality is to systematically teach children independence at a higher level. But this must be done slowly, just pushing the child to the necessary actions. At the same time, keep in mind that the volume of the task assigned to her should not be very large, otherwise the child will simply refuse to complete it at all.

CHILD EDUCATION

JUNIOR SCHOOL AGE:

2) improve the child’s “I”

Now the child needs his own assessments of the personal “I”. After the child did at the age of eight Deed, do not rush to give it your own assessment. Let the child learn to do this on his own.

Doesn't he know how to do it yet? Your task is to give the child the opportunity to independently carry out the process of searching for ways to objectively (!) Self-esteem, understanding the motives of one’s own behavior. In difficult situations for a child, give him hints, but in general, teach him independent self-esteem. In dialogue with parents, the content of actions is revealed, the essence of the inner “I” becomes clear to the child.

Analyze one of the child’s actions yourself, out loud, as if this is how you, by the way, think about the current situation. Put yourself in the child’s place, think instead of him (why did I do that?), then instead of the other participants in the incident. Bring the points of view of the child’s “I” and those other “I”s - children and adults. Give your child the opportunity, at least in this way, to hear the adult world, to see the diversity of adults’ assessments and their points of view. Show your child many “mirrors”, each of which reflects him in his own way. Deed. And highlight, emphasize the baby’s “I”, his point of view.

Such lessons are not forgotten. Believe me, next time the child himself will participate in such a dialogue with you, he himself will begin to think, compare, and analyze. And after one time he will be able to carry out this analysis independently. In this way, you develop in your child the habit of internal dialogue and conscious choice of behavior options in difficult life situations.

Remember how they teach children to play chess: “If I go here, then the opponent will go there, then I will answer like this...” And so on. At first, only the adult reasons out loud in this way. Then the child joins him. A little time passes, and the child begins to think about each move on his own. A little more - and the baby does this not after, not during, but before his move. Then the child begins to gradually beat the adult...

Analysis of actions soon leads to the fact that the child learns to “sort out” its content and consequences in advance. This is the transition from impulsive actions to conscious behavior, the transition to self-education. After all, in the end, the child must learn not so much our assessment of him Act, how much is its content. Otherwise, the baby will think about himself and others only from actions alone, and this is not always correct. After all, it is necessary to take into account both the motives of the action and the situation in which it was done, and therefore also understand its content.

taken from here http://mama-nana.ru/child/shkolniky-men-razdel/rebenok-9-let-men

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Which parent doesn’t want their child to be smart, cheerful, independent, and at the same time, surprisingly, obedient? After all, the baby still doesn’t know anything about the world around him, parents think, he needs advice, help and support, and sometimes direct instructions from adults. Disobedience is perceived by parents as the height of stupidity, sometimes even as self-destructive behavior, and is necessarily stopped. But if a child does not obey his parents, there may be much deeper reasons for this than stupidity or “harmfulness.”

Child development crises

The development of a child, both physical and psychological, does not occur gradually, but in sharp leaps. Everyone is well aware of growth spurts, or stretching periods before school and during adolescence, when a child grows quickly in a short period. The same leaps occur in the psyche - the personality also grows, sometimes so quickly that parents do not have time to react to it. There are several most common crises:

• Crisis of the year. The first encounter with the word “impossible” and the concept of prohibition.
• Crisis of three years. Development of the ability to generalize, and against this background, the perception of oneself as a specific being.
• Crisis of seven years. Formation of abstract thinking, ability to compare, perception of oneself as an individual.
• Teenage crisis. Puberty, the emergence of independence, independence from parents.

The age range of crises is very arbitrary - the crisis of seven years does not begin exactly at seven and does not end on the eighth birthday. A more precise age definition is 5-9 years, that is, preschool or primary school age. The time of the beginning and end of the crisis, its duration is different for all children and depends on many reasons, including the reaction of adults.

The crisis of preschool age is associated with the next important stage in the development of the child’s psyche - the emergence of the ability for abstract logical thinking, characteristic of adults. With the advent of this type of thinking, the child develops self-esteem and ambition, the ability to compare the results of his activities with the ideal result, and compare his behavior with the behavior of other people. The ladder test is very indicative in this regard - the child is offered a drawn ladder with steps reflecting the quality of performing some action (bad, good, best, etc.) and is asked to place himself on this ladder, that is, to evaluate himself. how he does something (sings, draws, puts away toys). Before the crisis of preschool age, a healthy child places himself at the very top level - he is confident that he can cope with any task better than anyone else. The preschooler evaluates himself more objectively, at the same time a new concept appears for him - the level of aspirations, and at this stage of development it is very high (the child wants to study straight A's, win all competitions, be able to do something that his friends cannot) . At this age, a preschooler may give up his previous hobbies, citing the fact that he is not good at it, but at the same time, new activities may appear. For example, a child who used to love singing suddenly notices that a classmate has a more beautiful voice, and loses interest in singing, and after a few days he is enthusiastically weaving beaded baubles. A new hobby attracts with its novelty, but how persistent it will be is a matter of time and the attitude of the parents.

School and preparation for it is an important factor stimulating the onset of a crisis - it makes it possible to compare one’s successes with other children, the status of a schoolchild is considered higher than that of a preschooler, and at school there is a need to follow the rules and study according to a schedule. In addition, a new authoritative adult appears in the child’s life - a teacher. And it often happens that a child behaves well in class, but at home does not obey his parents. Why does this happen, and what should adults do in this case?

Symptoms of the seven year crisis

The crisis of seven years is a very conventional name, and it is much more correct to call it the crisis of preschool and primary school age. Its signs can be divided into positive, neutral and negative. Unfortunately, parents are more concerned about negative signs, and against their background, not everyone notices the development of the child’s thinking, the formation of interest in global problems, and the emergence of new hobbies. Among the negative symptoms of the crisis are:

• Negativism is a pronounced disagreement with any statement of adults, even obvious ones.
• Dispute – refusal to carry out instructions from adults.
• Pause – lack of response to requests, instructions, demands of adults.
• Stubbornness - arises as a continuation of the argument, when the child continues to insist on his position, despite the fact that for the parents the problem has already been resolved.
• Disobedience is a refusal of usual responsibilities and rules that the child previously fulfilled without any problems.
• Cunning is a hidden violation of established rules. At primary school age, cunning is not yet a way to avoid punishment and does not take the form of a malicious lie.
• Insistent demands are an endless reminder that parents promised something.
• Whims are usually a symptom of earlier crises, but sometimes occur at the age of seven or eight.
• Painful perception of criticism also occurs quite rarely.

The most important thing that parents need to remember is that if the baby suddenly stops obeying, it is not because he wants to deliberately harm himself or others or do it out of spite. Before school and in the lower grades, there is an awareness of oneself as an individual, the emergence of one’s own internal position, which means that those rules that until now seemed obvious require testing for strength and rethinking. The child questions the authority of his parents in order to become convinced of its necessity and become more independent. At school, a child’s disobedience may not manifest itself as strongly as at home, because school is a much less familiar environment, and adherence to the rules here plays the role of psychological protection.

What should parents do?

• First of all, you should not succumb to provocation. A child’s behavior can be irritating, but giving in to it, raising your voice and putting pressure on him is a sure way to prolonging the crisis. If a child does not respond to a request or refuses to fulfill it, then it is useless to insist on this, but if you leave him alone for a while, then most likely he will do what they want from him. For a child, such behavior looks like a manifestation of his independence - he acts not on someone’s orders, but on his own.
• The student must be given the opportunity to face the unpleasant consequences of his disobedience. For example, if a child refuses to go to lunch on time, then he will eat when he wants, but he will have to warm up the food and wash the dishes himself. The main thing in this situation is the obviousness of the consequences. This shouldn't feel like a punishment.
• It is worth paying attention to positive changes in the student’s character. If he has taken on any chores around the house, he needs to be praised for it, but making this activity a duty is not a good idea, lest the child begins to perceive it as a rule that needs to be broken.
• A child's cunning at eight years old is a game, not an attempt to escape punishment. If a child sees that his trick has been revealed, he will carry out the assignment exactly as needed. The trick will become a real lie only when the student sees benefit in it for himself.
• Parents need to be consistent in reward and punishment. The child needs to see the boundaries of what is permitted, and these boundaries must be clear. At the same time, there should not be many rules, but they must be strictly followed. In this regard, psychologists advise to designate a child’s behavior using four color zones:
  • Green – zone of permitted actions (you can choose what to spend your pocket money on);
  • Yellow - a zone of activities that are permitted subject to certain rules (you can play on the computer only after homework has been done);
  • Orange is a zone of activities that in most cases are not permitted, but there may be exceptions to them (during the trip you can go to bed later than usual);
  • Red is a strictly prohibited zone (you cannot swear).
• Consistency in parental behavior. If adults set the rules, then they themselves must follow them. Only in this way will the little man understand that rules are not needed to limit his freedom.
• One of the most important points is that you need to talk to a child like an adult. We need to remind him that he is no longer small. At the same time, it is necessary to show the student that being an adult is not a privilege, but a change in the range of rights and responsibilities, the emergence of responsibility for one’s actions.
• If a child shows a desire to analyze his actions, experiences, problems, then you need to help him, even if he does this by constantly talking about the same situation. In this way, the child will be able to better understand himself, develop the ability to self-criticize, and learn to express his emerging independence more productively. Do not forget that the child does not obey primarily due to the inability to express his position differently.

It is important for a child to know that adults see him growing up and trying on adult things. But in the same way, it is important for him to see that expanding the range of rights also entails expanding the range of responsibilities, that in addition to the external attributes of adult behavior, there is also responsibility for one’s actions. The student needs to understand that independence should not be an end in itself.

Positive signs of the crisis

Disobedience is the simplest manifestation of independence that a child can afford. But besides this, there are other changes in his behavior that are positive or neutral. And in order to reduce the need to stop disobedience, it is worth paying attention to and encouraging the following changes in the child:

• Independence and self-study. The child can, of his own free will, take on any chores around the house. How persistent this desire will be is a matter of time. In this situation, it is important for the child to do something without being asked, like an adult. For the same reason, the scope of his interests may change, and new hobbies may turn out to be more persistent than those that were before the crisis.
• General issues. The child begins to be interested in abstract topics that are not directly related to everyday life - politics, space, biology, family history. This is an indicator of the emergence of abstract logical thinking in him, the expansion of his inner horizon.
• Eagerness for school. At seven or eight years old, most children love school and strive to get good grades. The status of a school student is very attractive for a child, because this is the next step in life; a school student is almost an adult.
• Imitating adult behavior. The child copies mainly external signs; this is a kind of game of becoming an adult. In a dispute with his parents, he cites logical, in his opinion, arguments heard from adults, and begins to talk a lot and at length about his behavior and experiences. Over time, the desire to imitate weakens, but in this form you can teach a child to really reason logically, to be aware of the motives of his actions.
• Increased attention to appearance. It occurs not only in girls, but also in boys. It is important for a child to look in a way that makes him appear older. Sometimes this can take caricatured forms. This desire should not be suppressed; the parents’ argument that you still have time to be an adult will cause more rejection than a desire to listen to it.

Parents should notice and reinforce positive changes in the child’s psyche, and then he will begin to strive for real, not ostentatious, adulthood, and, paradoxically, he will become more obedient. His disagreement with the position of adults will acquire a more meaningful character and become conscious, which means that the student will be able to be convinced. Reasonless stubbornness and the desire to do at all costs differently from what adults demand will become a reasoned opinion that can be changed. The concept of responsibility will appear, and it will not be imposed from the outside, but grown from within, consciously.

The psychology of an 8-year-old child is undergoing changes. An eight-year-old child feels like an established personality who has his own worldview and opinion. The psychological characteristics of 8-year-old children are determined by gender and individual personal qualities.

Parents must look for the right approach to the growing individual. At 8 years old, raising a child presents some difficulties for parents. The son or daughter protests and reacts inadequately to comments and advice from their parents. Mother and father must choose the right words and think through their actions so as not to hurt the feelings of a vulnerable teenager.

Having reached the age of 8, children consider themselves independent, they have established views and their own opinions. The young citizen wants to do on his own what was previously done with the help of his parents. A growing person wants to feel needed by society and friends. There is a desire to prove yourself, show off your talents, and assert yourself in front of your peers.
This is the age period when parents need to find a middle ground in raising the younger generation. If you care for your son or daughter too much, they will feel violated in their rights. Children will think that everything is always decided for them, they have no right to vote.

The other extreme, which is observed among some parents, is not to pay attention to changes in behavior, thinking that they will “outgrow it.” The attitude is wrong: children aged 8 years are extremely vulnerable, they need to feel the support of a loved one. Parents are an authority for a teenager; they give advice and guide if he asks for it. Mother and father are interested in the life and needs of their child. Close people know about the baby’s worries and try together to find the right solution to the problem.

How to properly educate a schoolchild?

A child at the age of 8 already attends school. For a schoolchild of this age, it is important to adhere to the correct daily routine for the child. This age is characterized by a strong attachment to electronic devices. Children become so busy with games, movies, and cartoons that they are ready to sacrifice sleep. It is important for parents to prevent such a situation. Sleep is part of a healthy lifestyle for a young family member. Teenagers get some information from the TV screen or computer. Sometimes the information received contradicts the advice of adults, and the child protests the parents’ comments.
Adaptation to school life occurs during the first year of school. The new student realizes that he is no longer the little child who was controlled and cared for by his parents; he will have to be separated from his relatives for some time and make some decisions on his own.
An eight-year-old schoolboy has already become comfortable within the walls of an educational institution, which is manifested by the following points:

• He knows the requirements for students of this age, fulfills them, and is accustomed to additional workloads.
• The kid has already met, made friends with his peers, has close friends, and has learned to have a conversation with the teacher and classmates.
• The opinion of peers is important; the student wants to imitate his friends, their actions, and interests.
• The young student is socially developed, has learned to communicate with others, and choose the right words.

Important! 8 years is the time when a teenager ceases to consider his parents as an authority and gives preference to peers in advice and interests.

The actions of parents at the stage of raising children should be tactful and timely. The following steps will bring them closer to their teenager:

• Be interested in your child's school life. It is important to control the immediate learning process, to know what the student is doing outside of school. Take an interest in the student’s social circle and concerns.
  Participate directly in the educational process: help with lessons, offer solutions to problems, monitor the correctness of thoughts.
• Praise the teenager for achievements and awards. This will help the student to assert himself and continue to strive to be better.
  Do not allow your child to withdraw into himself. The constant critical attitude of adults will alert the teenager, he will begin to doubt whether his parents trust him.

Establish a child's daily routine. A schoolchild needs to go to sleep at night on time - this will teach him responsibility and teach him to value his health.
A teenager in his ninth year of life thinks that he is already too old, he does not need the advice of his elders, but independence will come with age.

How to raise children's self-esteem?

Eight-year-old children pay attention to the skills and talents of their classmates. If they do something worse, their self-esteem drops. Self-criticism begins, the teenager considers himself worthless, an insecure person. The relationship between parents and children plays an important role here.
The main aspect of raising self-esteem is praise. It is important to praise the teenager for the successes achieved and acquired skills - this will show that the parents do not doubt him, trust him, and will support him in difficult times.
Discussion of family issues and problems concerning the teenager is carried out in his presence, allowing him to express his own opinion. In this way, parents will show that the opinion of a young family member is important to them, they listen to him and trust him. Communication at school sometimes forces a teenager to do like everyone else, so as not to stand out. But sometimes the motives of peers are fundamentally wrong; parents should guide the child along the right path, but it is important to do this without undermining the authority of the growing individual.

How to build confidence in a child?

Often 8-year-old children lack self-confidence. This happens due to the changing mood, actions, and words of peers. Adults need to make it clear to the child that he is needed and not useless. Parents can entrust their children with responsible work, praising them for their responsiveness and then for the results.
The mother and her daughter do household chores. Cleaning the house, cooking, shopping for groceries are women's affairs, the girl will be interested in the fact that her mother takes her into account and trusts her with serious decisions and responsible matters. Having entrusted an 8-year-old girl with responsible housework, her mother will teach her to be a disciplined, confident housewife.
An 8-year-old boy wants to appear like a grown man, like his father. He develops his own interests and hobbies. He wants to receive from his parents more freedom in choosing entertainment and activities. You shouldn’t let your son take his own course, and you shouldn’t overprotect him either. It is necessary to provide the freedom that he asks for, within reason.

How to raise an 8 year old girl?

Eight-year-old girls become assiduous, responsible, diligent, and dutiful. They spend most of their time on their appearance: clothes, hairstyle. By the age of eight, girls are interested in creativity, handicrafts, singing, dancing, and embroidery. Daughters become good helpers for their mothers and are more responsible in their studies. The girl should be constantly assured of love and praised for the work done. She will feel needed and useful to her parents. Daughters are less susceptible to emotional instability, they are more balanced, and they think more about education.

How to properly raise an eight-year-old son?

An 8-year-old boy shows less accuracy in his appearance. Often parents have to bring their son’s appearance into proper condition. 8 year old boys pay less attention to what they are wearing and how clean their clothes are.
Boys are less responsible in their studies, doing homework, and helping with household chores. They are reluctant to do the housework and homework assigned to them. Boys are active during recess and choose intense games. They also do not care about the process of studying or the state of their diary.
The intellectual development of this age in boys is higher than in female peers. They love to study various concepts and terms, expanding their vocabulary.
Often sons take their father's example, wanting to imitate him, and sometimes even replace him. They demand more freedom of action from parents. Boys are more susceptible to emotional swings, which affects their mood and behavior. A competent approach by parents will not alienate them from their children, but will bring them closer, making the relationship trusting.
Often boys need a confidential conversation with their father and mother. Parents give their son the opportunity to evaluate his actions and the consequences of his decisions, because an eight-year-old boy wants to seem like a grown man.

Attention! A psychologist's advice on raising boys says that they, just like girls, require parental attention and love, without realizing it.

What should a child know at this age?

An eight-year-old child is quite developed intellectually. Can read, write, count, and think logically. The teenager has his own opinion, which comes to the fore.
Children want to seem like adults, although they constantly need the support of their parents, but they try to hide it. An eight-year-old person does not solve all problems and difficult situations on his own. Parents are directly involved in the child's life.

By the age of 8, children’s personality is established and individual characteristics are formed. The student is interested in something specific and determines the type of activity he likes. A teenager is able to independently complete homework, solve problems, write beautifully, and express thoughts through drawings. Children of this age have excellent memory, visual information is especially remembered. They are able to draw conclusions based on the school material they have covered and the information they have seen, highlighting important points.
The daily routine for an 8-year-old child must be clear so that he can independently control and adjust it. Eight-year-old children navigate time and determine when to perform this or that task. Eight-year-olds should be able to take care of hygiene, school supplies, and clothing.

What to do with an eight year old?

Eight-year-old children find interesting things to do on their own. But they still need adult attention. You should play intellectual games, solve logical problems, and travel to interesting, educational places. Organize events where peers will be present. This will show that it is important to parents who the teenager communicates with.
You can watch his favorite movie together, read, discuss a book. This gesture will definitely be appreciated by your son or daughter. The main thing is that joint activities with parents will help develop the baby according to his age. Parents need to know what their child is interested in.

Uncontrollable child - what to do?

The eight-year age of a teenager is characterized by some behavioral changes. Some parents note a crisis at the age of eight for their child. It manifests itself in the following:

Children are often self-critical, anxious, sometimes aggressive, and embittered. The further behavior of the teenager depends on the educational tactics of the parents. Parents continue to assure their child of love, show tender feelings, and constantly and consistently engage in upbringing. They find interesting things to do with their children and help them feel needed. It doesn’t matter whether it comes to raising a son or daughter, everyone needs love, attention, and care.

Every year of children's lives brings new changes to the family. A 9-year-old child already has the ability to argue reasonedly and defend a point of view. The student independently searches for information that interests him, dialogues with adults become constructive, but mentally he is still a child. When building a relationship with him, you should take into account what a child of 9 years old should be able to do.

Psychologists consider this age to be the beginning of the next crisis in children. The time for pre-puberty has arrived. The student enters a transitional age when the main thing for him is the authority of his peer. The baby loves mom and dad, but the parents’ opinion is no longer decisive in the child’s actions.

Skills at 9 years old

Primary socialization has passed. With the help of communication skills, a developed social life is created. For 9-year-old children, a developmental feature is the transfer of values ​​from the family to the team.

Schoolchildren are willing to make contacts, create interest groups, quickly find new friends, and communicate easily. Conversations become more meaningful: the student expresses his thoughts clearly.

To understand how your child is developing, it is necessary to assess the following abilities at this age.

• They love to be in a group and feel free in it.
• They understand and support compliance with the rules and necessary restrictions.
• They are able to independently monitor and maintain order in their own room.
• They willingly help parents with household chores, as well as in caring for the younger children in the family. They enjoy taking care of pets and caring for them.
• Self-care skills have been developed: children independently observe the rules of hygiene and take care of their appearance.
• They read a lot, like to retell the contents of books, and discuss what they read with peers and adults. They have their own opinion and defend it.
• They are distinguished by a heightened sense of justice.
• There are no problems with orientation in time and space.
• It is impossible to single out a particular area of ​​interest. Children are interested in everything; they want to receive maximum information on any issue.

The workload at school increases, so schoolchildren spend more time doing homework and do not always have time to go out for a long time. The task of parents is to help organize the child’s routine so that there is always time for physical activity.

The formation and growth of bone and muscle tissue, which need load, occurs. It is necessary to support the child’s desire to play sports. Sign up for a section and take them to training.

A sedentary lifestyle is not conducive to the health of a growing body: it can lead to scoliosis, loss of vision, and weakened immunity. Children who move little often complain of general weakness and frequent headaches. You should definitely set aside time for a walk in your daily routine. This time should not be less than 2 hours a day.

For parents

The age of 9 years is the age when your child can develop an understanding of the value of family, respect for parents, and teach the child to take into account the opinions of relatives first of all. You can strengthen emotional, trusting relationships.

By controlling the student’s free time, social circle, and homework, it is necessary not to suppress his desire for independence. Raising an infantile, obedient child in everything is not so difficult. Simultaneously with such upbringing, problems are laid in future adult life, when the student turns into a lack of initiative and no aspirations.

It is necessary to be sincerely interested in the child’s affairs, to support in difficult situations, not to babysit or resort to threats. Conversations should take place as equals. If it is noticeable that the fidget is upset and is hiding something, with the help of leading questions you need to find out what kind of problem he has.

What seems trivial to adults can be a real disaster for children. Therefore, be sure to listen to the teenager, express your support, and together find a way out of the difficult situation. The words “back off with your nonsense” can push him to look for a listener on the side and get advice there, which can lead to tragic consequences.

Quarrels and scandals with parents are possible in cases where parents do not recognize the student’s independence. To prove it, he may go into conflict with his family. At the age of 9, they most often make attempts to run away from home.

It is often at the age of 9 that groups of leaders and outsiders are formed in schools. There are cases of individual children being rejected from the team. Such children become victims of being ignored and bullied by their classmates. A trusting relationship will help the child turn to his mother for help and ask for advice.

In such situations, parents should not wait for the situation to develop. We urgently need to establish contact with the class teacher and clarify the situation. If necessary, transfer the child to another class or school. Sometimes changing schools leads to negative consequences for the student’s psyche. That is why such a decision should be made taking into account the opinion of the baby himself.

In order to gain the respect of their peers, to become part of a group of classmates, children sometimes commit negative actions. In order not to be considered a weakling in class, a student can light a cigarette or try vodka. To prove their maturity, children begin to actively use swear words in their vocabulary. Rude behavior toward a mother, a teacher, or an elderly person on the street at this age is no longer uncommon.

Experts advise to forgive minor pranks and not allow them to be repeated. Smoking and drinking alcohol should be a topic for serious conversation. Prohibitions and shouting will not help here. The best way to persuade is the behavior of parents. If a mother scolds her son for smoking, but at the same time smokes herself, then her lecture will not have any educational effect.

Girls 9 years old

The speed of psychological development of a 9-year-old child depends on gender. Girls mature faster emotionally. At this age, they behave like little housewives, taking their mother’s example in everything. They help cook in the kitchen, keep order, and participate in discussions of the family budget.

From the moment of birth, parents raise girls as little princesses who need to be pampered and forgiven for their whims. At the age of 9, such babies are already well versed in cosmetics, know the types of diets, and distinguish between night and day creams. But pity and raising spoiled young ladies will not contribute to success in life.

When asked what a 9-year-old child, especially a girl, should be able to do, experts advise paying attention to the child’s psychological stability. Emotions mean a lot to girls. The ability to feel sorry, sympathize, and help loved ones is in the character of all girls. Mothers usually teach their daughters to take care of the household, cook, wash, clean and maintain order, and also take care of themselves and loved ones. A comfortable, trusting atmosphere in the family depends on the woman; this is exactly what a loving mother teaches her daughter.

Girls should receive the same education, especially in primary school, as boys. Hardening procedures and physical activity contribute to good physical shape. When choosing a sports section, you should take into account that for girls, the main thing is agility, grace, flexibility and coordination of movement.

If they do not want to engage in professional sports, it is best to choose sports with increased physical activity in the fresh air, such as running or skiing.

Already at this age, parents should start talking to their children about sex. It’s better for a mother to talk to her daughter, and a father to his son, than for children to start looking for answers on the Internet or from friends in the yard. You should not brush off such questions from children or turn everything into a joke.

The conversation must be serious. It is not necessary to go into details of the topic, but it is necessary to convey an understanding of the importance and meaning of love. The student must understand that he will receive the answer to such questions from the adults in the family, that is, they will not make fun of him.

Boy 9 years old

In raising boys, the emphasis shifts to maintaining discipline and respecting adults. Boys are raised more strictly. The principle - “you are a future man” - requires you to be strong, dexterous, and able to stand up for the weak.