When you see a beautiful girl on the street and want to start a conversation with her, you seem to be bound by invisible chains. Your experience tells you that a beauty may not respond to the word “Hi”, so you don’t even try to start a conversation.

Meanwhile, there are certain schemes for starting a conversation that allow even the most intractable young ladies to talk.

And these schemes are not so complicated - everything happens very simply if you act confidently.

I will now give you all the necessary schemes and advice. But first…

Information for thought

When a girl does not actively try to continue the conversation, the guy thinks that this is the end. That there are no chances and it is better to leave.

However, this is not at all the case.

You see, the nature of girls is such that they regularly raise obstacles in front of us, which can only be overcome by being confident and persistent men.

Already thousands of seducers have confirmed the fact that if you continue to get acquainted with a girl, despite her "show-offs", then a successful ending is almost inevitable.

When you continue the conversation despite her refusal, she is convinced that you are confident and so accustomed to success with girls that you are not going to end this communication. And after several such “overcomings”, your attractiveness increases dramatically, and the girl leaves you her phone number.

Those. in fact, she is just waiting for you to start communicating confidently and interestingly (interesting means responding positively and unusually to her rejection). And when she is convinced that you are a really interesting guy, she gives up.

This is perhaps the main feature that helps to start a conversation even with the girl who refused you from the very beginning.

Remember this, because you will meet resistance from the girl more than once. And you can overcome it only by perseverance and flexibility of behavior.

Main types of first phrases

Consider the main types of contextual phrases for dating (there are also directive phrases, but not everyone can get acquainted in a directive style; therefore, we will not analyze it).

• Her behavior or reaction

For example, if several guys have already approached the girl, then you can come up and say: “ And how long have you been hanging guys here? :)" or " Aren `t you ashamed!? Now these guys won't be able to sleep tonight because you rejected them :)».

These phrases relate to her behavior and are different from the banal “Hi! How are you?".

« Girl, why are you walking so fast? You will wipe off your heels!».

You can learn to suck phrases out of thin air.

• Her appearance

« Oh cool shoes. The other day I saw the same at the Queen of England ...- if she has shoes that the English queen would never wear. ;)

« You look good! I think few people know how to choose color combinations in clothes- if she really picked up the color combinations in her appearance well.

« Hello! I never thought that buttons could improve the look. Usually they only spoil, but in your case it's quite the opposite :)"- if she is wearing a jacket with unusual buttons.

You can think of any phrase you want. The main thing is practice.

• What's going on around

« Where did they all go?» - if a crowd of people moves in one direction.

« Have you seen two girls fight over a guy?"- you can say even when in fact it was not.

Contextual phrases are the easiest way to start a conversation with a girl. But if you've never tried them, then do a little workout. All day today, when you see a girl, come up with this phrase and mentally pronounce it.

Such a small mental practice will help you move on to real acquaintances the very next day.

If she's in company

If the girl is in the company, then starting a conversation with her is not entirely advisable. After all, she has jealous girlfriends who can easily “extinguish” your initiative in a couple of seconds.

But if you start a conversation with everyone, not paying attention to your goal (after all, she is so used to increased attention to her own person), you can cause not only the trust and sympathy of the whole company, but also the jealousy of the girl herself.

Use mind blowing questions

Find on the Internet (or better, think of it yourself) such questions that will make the girl want to answer and start communication.

The main thing is that these questions should be very interesting and non-standard.

For example, you can ask her: Hello! Can you make pancakes?". You don't ask if she can help you. And you just stun her with such a question that she is speechless. :)

Well, then you just say that you urgently need to make pancakes, and you don't know how to do it. Can come up with an interesting story, why did you need these pancakes, and tell it to girls every time you meet.

Don't be afraid to ask questions she doesn't expect to hear from you. The point of all this is just to ensure that you bring her out of balance.

And if in normal situations a girl is ready for you to start dating even before you meet, then here you have more chances of success.

Schemes of dialogues when meeting

You can personally bring out ready-made schemes for the development of a dialogue when meeting. Having come up with 2-3 shocking and very interesting questions, ask each of them at least 20 girls.

When you do this, you will have statistics of the most common female responses to each of your phrases. Then you just come up with interesting working answers already to their answers.

You should not climb into the jungle and think through the dialogue 10 phrases ahead. :) Three "levels" will be enough.

Most likely, such work will take some time.

But what if you don’t have time to come up with such schemes, and you need to say something right now?

When you can't think of anything

From our articles, you have already learned that you need to approach a girl right away. But what if you just don’t have time to come up with an interesting contextual phrase?

After all, beautiful girls come across to you most often precisely when you do not expect to see them at all. :)

To do this, it is enough to remember a couple of interesting questions and each time start communication with their help. And the moment you asked your question you will have 2-3 seconds to come up with any contextual phrase relating to her appearance or behavior.

This approach will work better simply because you won't be sidelined for lack of a ready-made phrase.

And then, when you have already approached, your brain will instantly generate the necessary phrase (though not so ideal), since the conversation will need to be continued.

As you can see, starting a conversation with a girl is not so difficult. Even if you have never tried dating in a contextual style, it is enough to gain the necessary experience. Believe me, such acquaintances will start to turn out for you sooner than you expect. ;)

Helpful Hints

Do you want to talk to a guy or a girl, but are afraid that the conversation will not work? This happens to many.

Imagine that you are talking to someone. Suddenly there is an awkward pause and you realize that you do not need to be silent, but no thoughts come to your head at all, as if the brain stops working. Only stupid ideas come to mind that you are ashamed to voice out loud.

The silence between you continues, you start to panic, your head goes blank and you can barely remember your own name.

Naturally, you want to prevent this situation. Well, we have good news for you. In this article, you will find as many as 50 conversation topics that will help you restart the conversation.

This list will come in handy before your first date or before going to a party.

Some topics may seem simple to you, but they are the ones that help when you find yourself in a stressful situation. You don't need to talk about aliens and philosophy at all to continue the conversation.

Topics for conversation with men and women

How to behave when there is nothing to say?

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1. Ask open-ended questions, as the interlocutor will be able to tell a lot of things.

2. It happens that you do not understand what the person is talking about. because you don't know much about the topic. In order not to interrupt the conversation, paraphrase the words spoken by the interlocutor. This will show not only your interest, but also that you really listened to your opponent. If you can't paraphrase, then ask more clarifying questions. This will show your interest in the chosen topic.

3. Exchange small things. When a person begins to tell the details of an event, it attracts listeners.

4. No need to be witty because it repels people. Start the conversation with a simple hello.

5. Prepare a few duty phrases, to avoid embarrassment.

6. Smile, only naturally. A smile draws people in and saves them during an awkward situation.

7. In a big company It is important to introduce yourself and shake hands with others.

8. Stop worrying about what people think of you. After all, others themselves think the same way, so embarrassment is unnecessary.

Hobby talk

If you find out what this or that person is interested in, then you will know almost everything about him.

A hobby is not a profitable business, since we do it not for money, but for relaxation and fun. Some like yoga, others like meditation and shopping, others like taking pictures.

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These questions will help you identify your interlocutor's hobbies:

What do you do in your free time?

This is a simple yet effective question, as you will be able to learn about more than just one hobby. If the person answers you vaguely, then you can ask more specific questions, such as:

1. Do you play any musical instrument?

2. Can you draw? / Do you make art? / Do you like to color pictures?

3. Do you like to dance?

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4. Let's talk about gadgets, cars or new technologies.

This topic is suitable if you are talking with a guy. Many girls are not interested in discussing computers and technology as such, but this does not mean that everyone is.

Still, there is a chance that you will meet a lady interested in technology.

Talking about work/school

Most people start a conversation with these topics. After all, children and adults spend a lot of time in these institutions.

But just be careful, because not everyone likes these topics. Older people, as well as people who do not like the place where they earn money, will not support a conversation on this topic.

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If you did not come across the above-mentioned interlocutors, then you can ask the following questions:

1. What do you do or what do you study?

This is the easiest way to start or continue a conversation.

2. What is your favorite (least favorite) subject at school or university?

3. Are you on good terms with your work colleagues or classmates?

People like to wash the bones of others or gossip in other ways. It may not be the best thing to do, but this way you will learn more about the character of the interlocutor.

4. Do you like your job or do you go there solely to improve your financial situation?

5. What is your dream job?

Trips

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Usually the most interesting situations happen to us while traveling. You could talk to your interlocutor about funny incidents. Something similar happened to him too.

1. What countries have you already visited?

If you both visited the same country, then you can exchange impressions.

2. Have you ever experienced culture shock?

3. What problems did you encounter during your travels, if any?

It will be interesting to hear such stories. Time will run unnoticed by both of you and you will not want to interrupt the conversation.

4. Have you ever traveled on your own, alone?

5. Do you speak foreign languages? Did you use them when you were abroad? How was it, did the locals understand you?

This information may be useful for those who want to leave the country or start studying abroad. After all, you will have to speak a different language, so the experience of another person will help you in future adaptation.

If none of you have traveled abroad, then you can dream and ask where each of you would like to fly.

1. Do you want to move? Where would you like to live?

2. Do you have a desire to travel?

3. Which country do you want to definitely visit?

A word of advice: fewer questions and more facts about yourself.

Most of the topics of conversation that we have added to our article sound like questions.

Warning! If you ask too many questions in a row to your interlocutor, he may feel that he is being interrogated.

It is better to first tell about yourself information on one of the proposed topics. You will notice that you will not need to ask questions in order to keep the conversation going. Indeed, in such a situation, people continue to speak out of inertia. It turns out smoothly and the person with whom you communicate does not feel discomfort.

For example, instead of asking directly what countries your opponent has visited, answer the question yourself. Start your line with these words: "I visited two countries last year: India and Belgium. They cook very tasty food there, so I often visit these countries."

If you started the conversation in this way, then you explained between the lines what you need to talk about next.

When you start talking about yourself, you show that you trust this information to your interlocutor and, in response, he trusts you and talks about himself. This is where the law of reciprocity comes into play.

But even in this case, you can overdo it if only you will speak, and the interlocutor will not have time to insert at least two words.

The takeaway is: ask fewer questions and remember that you are having a dialogue, not a monologue.

Entertainment

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While walking, you can hear what people around you are talking about, and most often it is about movies, various TV shows, books. There are always new products, so the topic does not lose its relevance.

1. What is your favorite movie or TV show?

You can talk about this topic for a long time, and if you find a match in your preferences, then forever.

2. What books or movies you read or watched are you ashamed of?

For example, many people like the film "Twilight", but they do not want to admit that they watched all five parts and that they sometimes review it.

3. What movie are you looking forward to the release of?

4. What kind of books do you like? What was the last thing you read? What genre is your favourite?

This question will help determine what kind of person is near you. You can determine the level of his intelligence.

5. Do you listen to music? What kind of music do you prefer?

If this is your first time talking with your interlocutor, then this topic is suitable. She is unobtrusive and interesting.

1. Talk about a place you recently visited. Does it have any zest? Did you like the establishment? Why?

2. What dishes do you usually cook at home? Do you enjoy cooking in general or do you prefer ordering food?

3. Do you follow a diet? What is this diet?

Now many people follow different diets, so you can learn from your opponent about a new or unusual diet.

Warning! It is better not to ask a chubby person about this, because it may hurt him if the topic of weight is painful for him.

4. What kind of food do you prefer?

After all, not everyone prepares European dishes for themselves. Perhaps your interlocutor likes Asian dishes.

Conversations about the past

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If you start talking about your past, then the conversation can smoothly develop into a therapy session. You will talk about unpleasant situations.

Do not even be afraid to start a conversation with a stranger, as such a conversation will even benefit you.

For example, such a Spanish writer and composer as Ruiz Zafon Carlos once said a very interesting thing:

"Sometimes it's much easier to talk to a stranger than to someone close to you. Why?

“Probably because strangers see us as we really are, and not as we would like to be seen.”

Why not try it, and suddenly it is an effective method.

Before you tell a story from the past, consider if it fits the general topic of the conversation. After all, when you talk about music, it would be inappropriate to recall how a wasp stung you as a child.

1. Where are you from?

2. What were you like as a child? Were you a rebel, a calm child, a gray mouse, or constantly looking for everyone's attention?

3. What did you want to be as a child?

It can be very funny. When we were children, we often thought about some fantastic or vice versa stupid professions. For example, I wanted to be a store clerk because I was convinced that I could take as many candies from the store as I wanted.

4. Where did you work?

5. Do you have a brother or sister?

6. What were your hobbies as a child?

It may turn out that you liked the same thing. You were probably both interested in the Harry Potter books or Pokémon. You will quickly find a common language with your interlocutor if you talk about this topic.

Yes, the problem is not simple. You sit, look at his or her photo on social networks, like it ... But how to start a correspondence? What would you say, so as not to repel, to interest, to please in the end. We will not blur the topic, sharing how to start a correspondence with a guy, like a girl, like a man, like a woman. Let's just try to look at the main options for starting a conversation with a stranger.

Correspondence: motives

In general, start with why you are writing to this person, that is, find out your motives. You will need to focus on them in the future, it depends on them what and how you write. To make it easier for you to get started, here are the most common motives that encourage people to write to strangers:

1. You liked the person in the photo, and you want to get to know each other better (by the way, find out here too if you want to make a friend or maybe even thinking about starting a relationship);
2. You just got bored and want to brighten up your pastime;
3. You want to show yourself, so to speak, brag about yourself for self-affirmation;
4. Your motive is to make useful acquaintances, contacts in a certain field or environment.

Where to begin

So, based on the motives we have proposed, let's try to consistently see how to start a correspondence with a girl or a guy on a social network.

Motive - sympathy

Perhaps the most common motive. It is logical that your goal is to please too.

1. Since you can start a correspondence in a contact, for example, not only with a personal message, you can use this. Comment on any photo of a person with an original comment. Although, to be honest, if a person is interested in you, then a simple comment on the photo, for example, of his dacha, such as: "how beautiful!" If you are not so interesting, then even the most original comment is more likely to be ignored. But there are always exceptions! In the end, a person may simply not notice your writings. So take your time and move on.
2. Banality. Write simply: “Hi, no, we don’t know each other, I just wanted to say hello to you.” Focus on the individual - "with you". And then how will it go.
3. You can start a conversation with a compliment. For the most part, this is the lot of young people, however, a girl can afford it. The main thing here is sincerity (be honest at least with yourself), write compliments if you really want to do it.
4. You can pretend to be wrong. The full namesake of your classmate (tsy), well, confused, with whom it does not happen. Perhaps the conversation will start.
5. Write that you know the face, could you meet somewhere. You remember your sweet face very much.
6. On the Internet you can find funny phrases, such as: “are there angels on earth?”, hinting that she is an angel (this is more about how to start a conversation with a girl). Although, for sure, there are similar “phrases” for guys too.

Rule to follow: do not try to drastically close the distance, it scares and repels (both guys and girls). Start acquaintance gradually, with abstract topics.

The main thing here is to rely on your main goal. You have to please the person. So build the whole conversation so that he (she) is pleasant to you. After all, there is such a phenomenon in psychology: we like those who like us. So show your affection.

Motive - boredom

Well, you can start anywhere. Your goal is to brighten up loneliness and get rid of boredom.

1. You can start right like this: "hello, I'm writing because I'm sad (put pressure on pity). I thought (a) this can be fixed by talking to a nice person."
2. You can come up with a topic, absolutely any, and offer to discuss it. It's good if you write questions, because it will be easier for a person to answer. And then, if the conversation starts, then he will start asking. The main thing is not to forget that you are writing, just do not jump to talking only about yourself, be sure to also ask about the person.

Motive - self-affirmation

Actually, you probably already caught the essence of our presentation. The goal is to increase your own self-esteem.

Put your favorite photo on the avatar and show off.

Motive - benefit, benefit

You have found a person in a field whose connections are useful to you. Your goal is to show interest.

Start the conversation in the topic, area with which your interest is connected. There will be two parallel lines of conversation here: You need to interest the person in yourself (ie, to please him, as discussed above) and show your interest in the "case". You don't have to start from afar, you need to immediately show that you are interested in "the opportunity to join a club", "to do this and that". Make a person an expert, ask, show him that he is smart (admire).

An interesting topic, how to start a conversation if you came to a party somewhere, to a meeting, to a meeting, etc., and everyone around is unfamiliar. How to start a conversation and what to do? This set of phrases will help you, just remember them, say them, and then everything will go like clockwork. The main thing is not to be shy and not to be squeezed, because for this you came there and didn’t you?

Article taken from a blog about networking

Here's one of the main problems of networking: how do I just walk up to someone at an event and will I speak?

But starting a conversation is easier than you think. The fact is that no one will reject you (most likely 🙂) if you come up with a smile and say: “I am such and such, it’s nice to meet you.” In fact, others will immediately feel better, because it was not they who had to start the conversation! By the way, do not forget about the article.

How to start a conversation. Simple and effective ways

But things will certainly go even better if you have a few proven ways to "break the ice" in stock. So we've come up with a list to run through before our next meeting - some from our experience, some from expert friends. But the main thing is that all phrases have been tested in real life and work!

Classic

When in doubt about how to start a conversation, go to the basics of the basics: ask what the person is doing, why they came to this meeting, or just reach out and say hello.

1. “Hi, I don't know much here, so I'd like to introduce myself. I am (name) and I work for (company).” Well, that's it!

2. "So what do you do?" Now the other person can talk about themselves first, and you can think about how to take the conversation further or how you could collaborate.

3. "What brings you here today?"

4. "How was your day?" This is my "key" to any situation, and he has never let me down. It's simple and always effective, especially if you smile.

Place, place, place

With anyone in the room, you have at least something in common (no matter what): at least the event you both came to, the place where it is held, food and drinks. Take advantage of these resources and strike up a conversation about your surroundings.

5. If there is food at the event, I often use it to start a conversation, for example: “I can’t tear myself away from these cutlets. Have you already tried?

6. "How did you hear about this event?"

7. "It's so hot (cold) in here." It doesn't matter if this is true, the interlocutor either agrees or objects, and now you are already talking about the weather, about the climate in general, and then about business.

8. “I'm a little taken aback by the flood of information that has been thrown at us today. Did you remember anything that really made sense?

9. “What a wonderful place. Have you been here before?"

News

Another thing that unites you is the news. Something happened in the city, in the world. Of course, you shouldn't start a heated political discussion, but mentioning something simpler can help to quickly strike up a conversation.

10. "What do you think about (topic relevant to event or person)?" I may be biased, but the news is a great contact tool.

11. “I can't believe all the headlines this week. Madness, right?

12. “How did you get here? Was it difficult to get there? The method of movement from point to point is a burning topic. They will probably tell you a story.

13. "Did you watch the match yesterday?" It's a classic, but there are reasons why it's become a classic.

If you're an introvert, walking into a room full of strangers can be especially challenging. A good tactic in this case is to scan the perimeter of the room and find someone who seems a little lonely. Maybe it's a woman sitting alone and hoping someone will come and talk to her. Be that someone and try something from this list:

14. “These networking meetings are just crazy sometimes. Can I sit with you, it's a little quieter here?

15. “Since we are both here (in the cafeteria, bar, waiting room), I think I should introduce myself. I am (name) from (company)"

16. “I'm trying to force myself to meet new people here, and not talk to my usual victims who already know me. Do you mind if I introduce myself?"

17. "I hate networking." If you feel like a misanthrope soul mate, step up and start a conversation about what you both dislike so much.

amusements

18. “I can’t believe that I came to this event in this form!” A little humor and self-pity never hurts.

19. Some kind of joke - for example, "I personally came here for these cakes." Then ask the question - "How did you hear about this event?"

20. "On a scale of 1 to 'undrinkable', how awful is Chardonnay?"

21. “Honestly, the only person I know here is the bartender. We met a couple of minutes ago. Can I introduce myself?"

Whatever comes to mind (sometimes that's what it takes)

If all else fails, try going the other way.

22. “Do you happen to know a good sushi place nearby? I don’t know the area well, and I need to organize a dinner after the event.”

23. “Are you by any chance a friend of (first name)?” It doesn’t matter if you really consider them friends, the interlocutor will answer “no”, and a conversation will begin.

24. If you notice a group of people engaged in a serious conversation, come up and say: “Your place is obviously much more interesting than in the last company with which I spoke.”

25. "Is there any question I shouldn't ask because you're already sick of it?"

26. “I'm working on an article about the best and worst ways to strike up a conversation. Did you manage to hear something good today or vice versa?

Guys usually come up first to meet and start a relationship. But if a handsome young man is in no hurry to take a decisive step, you can take the initiative yourself. To do this, you need to know how to start a conversation with a guy you like and interest him. Drop doubts! Doing this is easier than it might seem.

Often girls are afraid to start communication even through social networks. But there is nothing difficult in this. This is more effective than just waiting for your lover to decide to start a conversation with you. In the case when you are not at all familiar with it, there is no other way out - you need to write. If you miss your chance for a romantic relationship, you will be bitterly sorry later.

Interestingly, in Japan, girls are usually the first to initiate communication with the opposite sex. There are many advantages to this, for example, couples in which girls were the initiators of dating are less likely to get divorced. That's why you shouldn't be afraid to take the initiative.