Happy children in a happy family. Happy children in a happy family Children in a happy family VK

Have you ever thought about what family happiness is? What moments create the unity of several people, make the union harmonious?

The family was not formed in vain in the process of evolution. This is a community of people that has its own traditions, remembers its ancestors, respects its family, and strives to raise the new generation with dignity.

A real family is strong and friendly, all its members feel a close connection with each other.

How to live with your mother-in-law in the same apartment? Find out about this from ours.

What does it mean?

A happy family is immediately visible: between its members there is harmony, mutual understanding.

If you pay attention to the photographs, you will see smiling faces, people stand close to each other, there is a feeling of attraction between them, glances, gestures are directed towards loved ones.

Children in such families know that they are respected. Free time and relaxation happy family strives to spend together.

They feel good around them, small conflicts do not develop into major ones, but are incentive for change. If a quarrel arises, it ends quickly, because a happy family does not see the point in sorting things out, it is looking for a way to solve the problem better and faster.

When figuring out whether happiness really reigns in a family, you need to take into account that a family can be happy externally and internally.

Externally- This is an expression of one’s feelings and relationships in public. And it does not always coincide with the internal one. You may see smiling faces, but if you look closely, you will realize that in fact people are far from each other and are simply feigning happiness.

Internal family happiness is real, when there is no need to demonstrate your attitude, harmony always reigns.

The combination of external and internal manifestations constitutes complete happiness. It is such a family that is truly harmonious - it does not need to pretend - joy, fun, love are natural and do not disappear under the influence of circumstances or strangers.

What is family happiness like: psychology

What is family happiness?

Family happiness closely related to emotions feelings that family members feel towards each other.

When people get married, they hope that happiness will come to them, they will live together until old age, and have children.

However, the rose-colored glasses quickly fall off, family life sets in, financial problems arise, and people begin to see their partner’s shortcomings. The first one comes, then the next ones, and not every family goes through them calmly.

Many couples, others, live for years in war mode, unable to find a common language, but also not wanting to break up in order to create a new, more prosperous union. Eventually Not only spouses suffer, but also their children.

If you come home with joy, meet your soulmate, you feel good together, then you can call yourself a happy couple.

Qualities

Let's look at what qualities a happy family has.

A happy family will not sort things out in public, criticize the partner, or complain about the children or the older generation.

They act together, together and this is what unites them even more strongly. There are no strong disagreements in it, because the goals are directed in one direction, and there is such a family as a single organism.

Harmony - concept and manifestations

Harmony is a state of balance, balance.

In a harmonious family there are practically no quarrels, and if controversial situations arise, they are resolved as efficiently and beneficially as possible for all its members.

In a harmonious family there is a feeling of calm, integrity, there are positive emotions, and if someone is upset or sick, then close people support, help to get out of emotional negativity or a difficult life situation.

In a family where there is balance, the morning begins positively, in the evening people rush home because loved ones are waiting for them there and need attention and care.

The basis of harmony is calmness and that you are needed, that your loved ones will always support you, give you a smile, and help improve your mood.

They are unacceptable in such families - they upset the created balance and bring negativity into existence. Harmonious families are avoided as a factor threatening peace and integrity.

Are there ideal unions?

It seems that a happy family is some unattainable ideal.

You and your friends periodically conflict with loved ones, someone has financial difficulties, someone in other families gets sick.

And the question arises - are there really absolutely happy families? Yes, they are. This largely depends on the married people themselves, on their willingness to work on relationships, save them.

There is probably no concept of absolute happiness, and it is not achievable. But everyone is capable of creating a good, friendly family. However, this is a lot of work, and first of all on yourself.

You can not, you don't have the right to force others to change, but are able to work on their own attitude towards loved ones. And by changing your attitude, methods of influence, communication, you will begin to notice that family members began to behave differently.

Each person has his own concept of happiness, so it is impossible to derive a single formula, a recipe, following which you and your family will certainly be satisfied with your life together.

But if you try to bring harmony and joy to the world, then you can certainly achieve this. There are happy families, and they are made so by the people themselves, who are ready to fight for their happiness and build it.

Examples

In glossy magazines and programs they often talk about couples whose love could be set as an example.

We must understand that every family is individual. The methods for creating happiness vary from person to person.

One of the best examples is elderly couple, who lived together for many years, maintained love and fidelity. They have happy children and grandchildren who come to them on holidays, but do not forget on ordinary days. Such a family can say that “we are together no matter what.”

Happy couples can also be found among celebrities. One of them - Monica Bellucci and Vincent Cassel. They have been together for 15 years and are raising two wonderful children.

Another famous couple - Jada Pinkett Smith and Will Smith- one of the strongest couples in Hollywood, they have two children, have been married for 14 years, Will does everything to make his wife feel loved.

Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell together for about 30 years. Goldie says the most valuable thing to her is that she feels loved.

Svetlana and Fyodor Bondarchuk have been together for 20 years. After so much time, their feelings have not faded away, and they are not shy about showing them in public.

Angelica Varum and Leonid Agutin. An amazing couple whose love is noticeable from the outside. Despite their bright and temperamental characters, they love and appreciate each other, and preserving the family is important to them.

What do you need for this?

What makes a family happy?

Having an idea of ​​what a good family is, the question arises: what needs to be done to make it happy?

1. The desire of two people to develop a relationship, their way out of crisis situations as painlessly as possible.
2. Children- one of the reasons for happiness. Of course, you can be happy with your life without them, but many couples break up because one of the partners does not want or cannot have a child.
3. Striving for one goal. If a woman wants children, and a man is more inclined to travel and entertainment, then sooner or later conflicts will arise on this basis.
4. Sexual compatibility. Intimate life is one of the most important in life together. Incompatibility of partners often becomes the reason for betrayal and dissatisfaction with each other.

   Ideally, the need for sex should be approximately the same, or one of the partners makes compromises.

5. Ignore small problems, they're not worth it. Quarrels over nonsense destroy harmony and slowly undermine the stone of happiness.
6. Spend time not only together, but also allow each family member to have their own hobby and the opportunity to relax alone. Every person needs personal space.
7. Don't hold back your emotions, do not accumulate them inside, especially negative ones. If you are sad, feel angry, talk to your loved one, tell them what is bothering you. If you feel joy, happiness, love, gratitude, share these emotions as often as possible.

How to diversify family life? find out right now.

Pledge and rules of well-being

By observing the following simple secrets, you will become closer to the feeling of family happiness and harmony.

• love your spouse;
• respect his values, freedom, wishes of his partner and children;
• be able to make compromises to maintain happiness and balance;
• Welfare and finances are one of the pillars on which family life rests. Money problems affect your happiness;
• have common interests. Naturally, spouses can have their own hobbies, but there must be something that unites them;
• have common goals;
• look at raising children the same way;
• when problematic situations arise, conduct a dialogue;
• trust between group members is one of the important points;
• be able to be sincere and tell the truth. Lies come out sooner or later.

How to be a happy wife?

In order for a woman to become happy in family life, she must first choose the right man.

You need to work on your happiness. Relationships don't develop on their own.

If you get married, you take responsibility for maintaining harmony in the relationship. It is unacceptable to shift responsibility for your actions onto others.

Supporting loved ones in difficult times- one of the keys to family happiness.

Recipes for family happiness

How to become a happy family?

There are no uniform recipes, but they still exist general principles, tested on many unions.

1. Respect each other. If there is no respect, the family will sooner or later fall apart, it will simply have nothing to support it - two people will live next to each other, completely disregarding the interests of others.
2. Create family traditions and stick to them.
3. Spend time together. Traveling, weekends outside the city create leisure, unite, allow you to communicate more closely and understand your partner and your children.
4. Support your spouse in difficult times. When a person is having a hard time, has problems at work or is unwell, he needs the sympathy and advice of loved ones. Indifference and inability to provide support alienate.
5. Learn to respect children. A child, even a small one, is an individual; he needs self-expression, a certain amount of freedom in actions and thoughts.
6. Cultivate respect for elders in children.
7. Touch each other. Tactile sensations help us experience intimacy, and touch can express more than words.

Remember that in order for a family to become happy, all its members must strive for this.

Work on your relationships, do not let negativity seep into your union, do not let strangers interfere, and then harmony will accompany you throughout your entire life together.

7 rules to make your family life happier, from Dale Carnegie:

If we don't know what to look for, we often deprive ourselves of important knowledge. People who mean a lot to us include, without a doubt, our children. Those of us who lived a joyless childhood repeat the same sad mistake as parents, and all because we do not know how a happy family works. .
All happy families are alike, each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.

Leo Tolstoy. “Anna Karenina.”

There is a formula for a happy family that we can adopt.

Happy families use the “spiral of love”

Most parents love their children, but in happy families, parents show their love constantly.

Raising children is not an easy task. The tension of family life is such that events can develop only in two ways.

The first is a downward spiral. A child screams, children break something, some trouble happens. Angry parents react with criticism and punishment. The child screams even louder. The situation is getting more complicated and worse.

The second pattern is an upward spiral. Children are smart, quick-witted and inquisitive. They love to learn and need adult attention. Even the simple presence of the mother makes the baby rejoice and smile. Parents are proud of their children and show small signs of love, thanks to which children begin to frolic and have fun even more. And the touched parents experience even greater tenderness and pride. And so on.

Both spirals are present in every family. But in happy families, positive spirals outweigh negative ones many times over. In such families, children grow up calm, self-confident and repeat the positive spiral model in their own family.

The atmosphere in the family is set by parents with their first actions when they have their first child. By creating and strengthening a positive spiral, parents slowly but surely lay the foundation for a happy and strong family.

The payoff for the first manifestations of parental love is colossal. Relatively little effort brings enormous benefits to both the child and the parents.

Happy families are characterized by positive rather than negative feedback.
Researchers working in one school noticed that teachers praised good work and criticized bad behavior. As an experiment, they were asked to praise both good performance and good behavior and ignore bad behavior. Soon there was virtually no bad behavior.

At home, praise is also much more effective than criticism and reproach because it reinforces the upward spiral. Living by the 80/20 principle encourages effortless praise and endless returns in a child's life. Praise is to a child's development what water is to a flower: a little encouragement encourages lush growth. A child raised in a warm, friendly atmosphere of love and attention has an incredibly positive impact on other people throughout his life. A little praise will bring you huge benefits in the future.

In happy families, parents always have time for their children
A close, intimate relationship between parents and children establishes a sense of security and reliability for the rest of their lives.

Children do not understand the meaning of the expression “due time”; they constantly demand attention. And absolutely right. According to the 80/20 lifestyle, we should give more attention and care to a few people, those who are near and dear to us. Time spent with a child is time spent usefully for the child, the family, and society as a whole.

If you cannot communicate with your child, make sure that he does not see you. He can come to terms with his absence, but he can’t come to terms with your busyness, when you are nearby but don’t pay attention to him.

In happy families, parents are friendly and attentive to each other.
Children are incredibly perceptive and have an amazing ability to communicate. They love to play pranks on their parents and turn one against the other. For them, conflict is an intriguing and empowering phenomenon.

Such entertainment must be nipped in the bud by any means necessary. Parents must constantly show that they love each other even when they are unhappy with something. And as a result, love that overcomes and conquers irritability and anger will bring happiness and joy.

Happy families are able to cope with difficult and disobedient children
In general, happy families have no easier time than unhappy ones. They are simply better able to cope with difficulties.

If you have a child, be prepared for the possibility that he or she may be a difficult child. Children are unpredictable and can shock you.

My friends had serious difficulties with their son, but they managed to cope with them very well. I asked how.

“We attended trainings for parents,” said the father. - At them, all problems were divided into three categories: our own problems, generated either by the parents themselves or by other family members; general problems generated by children and family, and problems of the child himself, usually not related to the family. Each category of problem requires a special solution.”

“During the consultation process,” his wife added, “it turned out that most conflicts arise from the son’s problems, and we need to change our attitude towards Charles’s (son’s) difficulties. We began to offer him a solution to his problem, and left the choice up to him. This helped reduce conflicts by three quarters, and our family life became more harmonious and calm. And Charles became much happier, since we stopped constantly telling him what to do and how to do it.”

Happy families maintain discipline without depriving them of love
Punishment is an effective method, but only when absolutely clear boundaries of permitted behavior are established. Removing privileges for a certain period of time is a reasonable and effective method. In this case, it is necessary to let the child understand that he was punished for a specific action, and not for a quality or character trait. And in any case, no matter what the child does, never deprive him of warmth, love and understanding.

For my good friends, this wisdom did not come easily. They have two sons, both already in their twenties. These are nice and intelligent guys. However, at one time the younger Daniel caused them a lot of trouble.

When Daniel was eleven years old, he stole money, quite successfully shifting the blame onto his classmate. Daniel's mother, realizing the need for radical measures, deprived her youngest son of attention. She didn’t speak or communicate with him for almost a month.

Her decision turned out to be a real disaster. When she realized the mistake she had made, she tried to compensate for her love with sensitive attention and care. But Daniel, and therefore the entire family, continued to be plagued by problems, partly caused by the deprivation of love and understanding during this difficult period.

Punishment, as a rule, is not the only, much less the best, means of maintaining discipline. When a child cries, is naughty, or plays pranks, parents are tempted to either punish him or give in to his demands so that peace and quiet reigns. Instead, you can explain to your child that whining and crying will not achieve anything, but your smile is quite capable of creating a miracle. If from the age of four you encourage smiling more than crying and whining, what do you think your child will strive for?

Happy families tell bedtime stories
The 10-20 minutes before your child falls asleep is the most valuable and important time. A bedtime story allows you to show your love and provides your child with enjoyable and engaging dream material.

The children of one of my friends loved to listen to bedtime stories, because every night their father would invent a new story in which they were the main characters. You can come up with fairy tales in advance or use the help of friends with a rich imagination.

Another great idea is to ask your child before bed, “What did you enjoy doing today?” If he recalls in his memory all the good things that happened to him during the day, he will fall asleep peaceful and serene. Some psychologists believe that this practice can prevent depression.

Given the value of such communication, both directly for the child and for strengthening your closeness, turn this communication into a pleasant tradition. The effort is minimal and the reward is priceless.

What does a child need in order to develop normally and feel happy? The answer is quite simple - a happy family in which an atmosphere of harmony, love and care for others reigns. Unfortunately, not all families in today’s world can be ascribed a similar definition: lack of finances, fatigue, eternal haste and bustle simply kill home comfort and mutual understanding, and children, as we know, are extremely sensitive creatures to such things. Surely, any mother would really like to pay more attention to her children, but this does not always work out, because the morning rush to work forces you to quickly prepare breakfast for the baby and quickly drop him off at school or kindergarten, and then you need to rush to work so as not to be late.

After which some troubles periodically happen at work, because of which the head is spinning, irritability appears and, naturally, severe fatigue. After work, mothers rush to kindergarten or school, pick up their baby and run home. Cooking, feeding the baby and the whole family, while the mood is not very good and every disobedience of the child can drive him crazy. But it’s not the baby’s fault, because no matter how much he builds his mother’s mood, it’s her busy schedule! Look at such a story and, for sure, someone in this story can see themselves. And, if you look deeper, during the work week, mother and baby practically do not communicate, well, if you don’t take into account the morning, while taking them to school or kindergarten, and for some hour in the evening before bedtime. Probably, every mother would like to pay more attention to her baby, so that later in the future she will not regret that she did not pay attention to the child at the age when he so needed it. You can’t quit your job, because you have to support the baby so that he doesn’t need anything. But what to do in this case, if it is simply impossible to live differently?

So, perhaps we should start with the dependence on each other of raising children and marital relationships. It is always worth remembering that a child, like a sponge, absorbs everything he sees, therefore the way parents behave in the family becomes the fundamental principle of the child’s behavior in society. It is very important that the child sees only sincerity, love and support in this regard. In any situation, in any mood, colossal work must be done to ensure that family squabbles, conflicts and showdowns are not revealed to the child’s eyes. Only harmony and only love - this is extremely important for the formation of a child’s personality. Children in a happy family always grow into strong individuals.

Raising children and teenagers in itself should exclude any negative emotions under the roof of their home. Under no circumstances should the child hear any shouting or see any outbursts of anger. Moreover, in general, a child should be scolded as little as possible, much less subjected to physical punishment. It is worth remembering that the best way to solve a problem is to prevent it. If your child has everything he needs for self-realization, he will not have the desire to play pranks and do dirty tricks.

It is very important that the child always feels needed, so do not forget to remind him of this hourly, every minute. It doesn’t matter how - verbally or by action. The main thing is that the child feels this need and care with his whole being.

Don’t forget about the child’s need for communication. This should be a combination of communication with peers, and simply other children, with communication within the family itself. Listen very carefully to what your child says, ask him about things that are important to him and, even if there is very little free time, still try to find a minute to listen and understand your baby.

Tell him you love him. As often as possible. As often as possible. This is the only way the child will feel truly happy.

And most importantly, every minute of your child’s life should be filled with magic and miracle, which will forever remain in your baby’s soul, warming with pleasant emotions in childhood and warm memories in adult, independent life.

In this article we will give the answer to one of life's most pressing questions. Agree, no matter how strong and freedom-loving a person is, sooner or later in the life of every healthy individual the need arises to start a family.

For thousands of years, people have created families. This “rite of happiness” is still carried out today. But what about those who have taken an invisible vow of celibacy, you ask. As you know, there are exceptions to the rules, but we will talk about them in detail another time.

What is family happiness? There can be an incredible number of answers. It will take a lot of time to describe all possible options. However, even in this case there is a possibility of not giving the correct clear answer. All people are different, and everyone has their own family happiness. We will take a risk and put forward our own theory. You can agree with this point of view or not, that is your right. Remember, everyone has their own truth, but the truth is somewhere nearby. Let's try to get closer to it together.

Family happiness is, first of all, responsibility for physical and emotional safety and comfort, divided between two. Usually such people create a strong union, and a stamp appears in the passport of a citizen of a particular country. But this is not at all necessary at the present time. Now all you need to do is choose your partner well. But how can this be done if there is no single criterion throughout the world that can guarantee the correctness of the choice?

You need to pay attention to your partner’s ability to provide sincere and genuine care that the other partner has never demanded or thought about. This comes as a matter of course. To perpetuate and increase family happiness, children are born into the family.

Children are one of the important and irreplaceable components of a happy life. These are completely new individuals, in whose veins flows the blood of a married couple. Life is not eternal, but the family line, thanks to the birth of children, can continue for thousands of years.

A child in a family helps adults Every day he learns to sincerely enjoy life, because everything happens for the first time for him. This gift was once given to us all by nature, but as we grow older and receive new information and experience, we forget and lose a lot.

In a happy family wise parents become sensitive observers and teach their children to be happy. In the process of teaching the fruit of their love, people expand their comfort zone. In such conditions, a person will never feel pitiful, lonely or not needed by anyone at all.

Children, despite all their shortcomings and lack of independence, are needed by a happy family. They give the couple the opportunity to change their worldview in the right direction, set priorities correctly, see their mistakes, and find a way to correct them. If there is harmony in the family, parents will be able to teach the child not to commit such embarrassments.

However, we should not forget that even the smallest child is an individual. There is no need to become complete egoists and raise children so that they always meet your expectations, because you are not perfect either. Understand that no matter what good advice you give to your children, they will try to be like their parents. You must follow your recommendations, which you leave to your descendants.

If you're lucky, when the parents get old, which, unfortunately, cannot be avoided, the children will take on the role of the one who will take care of them. Just as mom and dad taught a new person to take his first steps in the literal and figurative sense of the word, taught him to live, and supported him in all his endeavors. From this we can conclude that children are the key to a happy family life and confidence in life.