Why do all the girls look the same now? Why are all girls the same now (outwardly)

Beauty ideals of Leonardo DiCaprio, Jake Gyllenhaal and Bruce Willis

They say that men strive for variety in love and sex. But this is not entirely true... Many people, it turns out, have their own ideal of beauty. Take Leonardo DiCaprio, for example. Over the past ten years, he has had a dozen girlfriends. However, if you line up all his girls in a line, they can easily be mistaken for sisters. Gisele Bundchen, Kristen Zang, Bar Refaeli, Blake Lively... They all have model looks, successful careers, as well as blond hair, long legs, an elongated oval-shaped face and a rather noticeable nose.

However, DiCaprio is not the only one who has girls to choose from. Everyone still feels sorry for Bruce Willis, whose second wife, Emma Heming, is simply incredibly similar to his first. Fans of the actor sincerely see this as proof that he still cannot forget Demi Moore.

Jake Gyllenhaal also has consistent taste. His ideal of beauty is a petite blond girl with blue eyes and a heart-shaped face. Just like his ex-girlfriends Kirsten Dunst, Reese Witherspoon and Taylor Swift.

However, not only men, but also women are faithful to the once chosen type. Thus, it is impossible not to notice the similarities between Nicole Kidman’s husbands – Tom Cruise and Keith Urban.

So how is the ideal of beauty formed? And is it possible to change your love karma?

Oedipus complex, or the eternal search for a parent's double

How does the choice of an object of love occur? Doctor of Biological Sciences Yuri Shcherbatykh argues that the most common hypothesis is the psychoanalytic concept, which states that “the parent of the opposite sex has the strongest influence on the choice process, especially if there was a close relationship between the parent and the child in early childhood.” Subsequently, this “primary image of the ideal” is modified and supplemented. But by adolescence it is usually already formed.

If you line up all Leonardo DiCaprio's ex-girlfriends in a row, then who will this friendly line of women start with? Most likely from his mother! If you look at the actor’s mother, it’s easy to understand where his ideal of female beauty came from. Blonde hair, facial features, physique... It is quite possible that Leonardo DiCaprio does not collect blonde girls at all, but is simply looking for his mother’s double (and no one in Hollywood has any doubts that he is a mama’s boy), again and again falling in love with girls who look similar to her. But external similarity does not at all guarantee similarity of characters.

As Colin Farrell's character said in the film Alexander, looking at his sleeping wife after their wedding night: "What a pity that you are only a pale image of my mother."

Another member of the American Psychiatric Association and the Indian Psychiatric Society, Eric Berne, argued that a person’s life is largely determined by his parents and the life scenarios that they involuntarily lay in his subconscious.

And Yuri Shcherbatykh wrote that often “a lover does not love a specific person, whom he calls “My beloved and only,” but his ideal model projected onto him.” Is this why all DiCaprio's relationships end? After all, sooner or later the glasses of love fall off, and the man begins to see the woman as she really is, and not as he imagined her to be.

Birds of a feather

It's funny: no matter who Leonardo DiCaprio starts dating, the reaction from the media and the public is always the same. "What a beautiful couple! They look so great together! They suit each other so well.” And indeed, looking at the gossip columns, you are convinced that DiCaprio always chooses girls to match himself - who fit perfectly with him and harmonize in appearance. NLP experts Bob Bodenhamer and Michael Hall explain this pattern very simply: “When people become similar to each other, they like each other... when people look, talk and move alike, they tend to attract each other.”

So many men, without realizing it, are looking for their soulmate in the literal sense of the word. This is the law of attraction. It’s not for nothing that NLP trainers advise girls to “mirror” the man they like.

Be that as it may, there is no arguing about tastes (and especially about ideals of beauty). It’s too late to change Leo, who is already approaching 40 and who plans to remain a chronic bachelor, Gyllenhaal, who is over 30 and who desperately wants to get married, and even more so Willis, who is over 50 and who is quite happily married. You just shouldn’t try to change your partner “to suit you”, forcing him to adapt and change. Thus, psychologist Larisa Kupryanchik believes that “the basis of the sexual desire for the antipodes is the biological tendency to avoid extremes.” This means that you don’t need to look for a second mother/second dad or a second self in your partner. You should be happy that you can be completely different, which means you can harmoniously complement each other!

Photo: Splashnews/Alloverpress.ru, Wenn

Do you agree that all girls are the same now? Dark (or blond) hair, bright eyebrows like a house, a photo on an iPhone near the mirror.... With pouting lips, or in a swimsuit at home, or even worse in underwear, all arched over... a la where are the parents...

In fact, it is “fashionable” now, on the contrary, to be “not like everyone else”, “special”, “ugly” beauty is being promoted en masse, just look at photographs of famous models, many of them are not just beauties, they can’t even be called “average”.

Or is it a new fashion now to take pictures of everything that is not pinned down: legs on the beach (probably the most popular pose, when a girl lies down and takes a picture of her legs and swimsuit), food, nails, body parts, gifts, flowers, lips, cups, etc. put it all on the Internet.
everyone has the same face and the same photographs... it’s rare these days you meet a girl who isn’t obsessed with all this. which would be beautiful and natural without all this... everyone here is advised to wear a dark color, even if the girl is fine with light hair, of course, you need to create another clone.

Yes, there is a certain standard of beauty, say, Angelina Jolie. And now, with the help of highly developed plastic surgery and a colossal amount of cosmetics, it is possible to get closer to this ideal. Previously, this was almost impossible, but now contouring facial features allows the “ugly duckling” to emerge from the house as a “beautiful swan” within an hour.

If you wash off their makeup and put them in a row, they will all immediately become different, but it is not a fact that they will be the way society wants them to be.

Look at the photos of these girls: don’t they look very, very similar, like sisters? But the relationship between them is like that of a Jack Russell terrier and an African hyena! But why do all these beauties (yes, undeniably beauties) look so alike? Chiseled cheekbones, a neat little nose a la Megan Fox, plump lips, long straight hair, the same facial expression...? The trend of “sameness” has become so widespread that many Internet wits are already joking: they say, I went to the toilet, came back and can’t determine which of those girls... is mine?

It's laughable, but it's obvious that in pursuit of stereotypical beauty, young girls reshape their faces, break their psyches, experience stress, suffer from numerous depressive disorders - and all in order to... please men? It turns out that modern representatives of the stronger half prefer... identical dolls? There are more questions than answers!

About the expert: Inna Yakovenko, specialist in life coaching and personal effectiveness coaching.

You don’t need to be a psychologist to diagnose self-doubt, rejection of your own body and lack of self-love for your loved one. The cause of these “illnesses” is, of course, trauma from childhood or the drama of personal relationships. That is why a professional plastic surgery clinic, in addition to consulting with a surgeon, will also refer you to an appointment with a psychologist (let’s agree that now we are NOT talking about cases where a person’s body has been disfigured by illness, accident, or has a congenital/acquired defect; in this case, plastic surgery is salvation, and an experienced doctor is God).

But what pushes girls with quite decent appearance to experiment with pumping up/increasing/reducing, etc.?

If we talk about values, then this is a person’s eternal desire for beauty and well-being. The catalyst for making the decision to change one’s appearance, as at all times, was fashion and the entire industry that supported it, the bearer was public people, the herald was the media. And due to globalization, the conventional standard of beauty has become more widespread than ever. It is obvious that another aspect of the topic raised is the lack of one’s own opinion regarding “beautiful”.

Is there a demand for such girls? Undoubtedly. As my financier friend says: “No demand, no supply. This is the ABC of economics." But what’s interesting: I interviewed a dozen men from different countries, aged from 25 to 40 years old, attractive, smart, well-groomed and, as a result, popular among women, and this is what I found. Almost all of them view such girls as a sexual object, and few would dare to have a long-term or family relationship with them. “In China, a husband sued his wife for not informing her before the wedding about the effect of plastic surgery on her body. I would also apply. It’s one thing to change one’s appearance, another thing to change one’s genotype.”, - noted a familiar cardiac surgeon.

“If we talk about changes related to fashion and the wishes of “male owners,” this only applies to certain strata of society. Their whims are incomprehensible to many - huge houses, motorcades, crocodiles in swimming pools, suturing of the hymen and other “charms” of the “beau monde”. The opportunity to ride in a carriage with a patterned dress among the wretched crowd is no longer there, but the desire to stand out is still alive.”“, - summed up Vlad, an expat in the field of bio-technologies.

Men, who themselves are frequent guests of gyms and plastic surgery clinics, reacted acceptably to relationships with doll-looking girls. For these people, the cult of the body is above all else. But they are also opposed to a large number of interventions. I obviously didn’t interview the “daddies”.

As a coach, I note that the end often justifies the means. There are different ways and tools to achieve it. The desire to be beautiful is eternal, and medicine does not stand still. And if the desired career requires correction of the nose or the shape of the ears, then only you can decide what to do with it, and what is more important to you. I also do not deny the statistical problem of a shortage of men existing in Ukraine, and, as a consequence, growing female competition.

But appearance serves as a tool of attraction, but not retention. Very soon any beauty becomes commonplace, and even Monica Bellucci once got bored with her husband. Fashion is a changeable thing and there are already trends towards a preference for naturalness and personal viability. Are you sure that investing in plastic surgery will not eventually lead you to the office of a psychotherapist or psychiatrist? +

A lot of inner work is required in order to be confident and at peace with oneself. But the mission is feasible, and care, support, respect and tenderness are also eternal in the list of preferences of men, like beauty.

As a child, I loved playing with my mother's makeup bag. Of all the treasures hidden in her plastic insides, my favorite was the sharp-beaked drawing pen - a menacing-looking drawing device that Soviet women used to pluck their eyebrows into a thin thread. I liked the gray-blue shadows, ideal for drawing princesses, a little less, but my mother did the opposite: if the punishment for a lost drawing pen was symbolic, then a broken palette was classified as a particularly serious crime. Once, having stood up for her in the corner, I went to paint my malvinas to visit a friend - her mother had the same shadows. And the same drawing feeder. And the same brasmatic mascara. Only the blush and views on the education of young artists are different.

The contents of Soviet women's cosmetic bags were strikingly similar: Polish eye shadow, French powder, mascara from the banks of the Neva. Everyone had their hair cut and curled like Edita Piekha, their eyes were painted like Barbara Brylska and, according to my mother, they looked “like they came from the same incubator.” Later, when I started using cosmetics for their intended purpose, instead of telling anecdotes, she told me how, together with her friends, she got those modest shadows and powder - by squeezing, saving up and standing in line or through friends, “we’ll meet at midnight at the crossroads.” Mom always ended her stories the same way: how good it is that these are different times, different customs, and there is no shortage of porcelain, nails, or decent eyebrow pencils. Now, my mother said, young people can look whatever they want. If you want, be a blonde, or if you want, be a redhead, draw, paint, highlight, matte, varnish, with shimmer, glitter, pink powder on top - a continuous celebration of individuality.

No, mom. Alas, everything turned out to be not so simple.

Now, when cosmetics stores inundate customers with news about their “revolutionary new products”, when there is so much red in the palette of nail polishes that the human eye is not able to distinguish the nuances of shades, when every girl has enough French perfume and powder to sink a squadron and repaint an elephant in beige, everyone looks the same again. No kidding. If in doubt, open Instagram and look at the main stars there. Everyone has hair the color of dark chocolate or platinum blonde, wide eyebrows with a clear contour, plump lips in matte nude lipstick, painted cheekbones and a nose with a thin back (“darken on the side, highlight on top”). The average Instagram beauty is good, no doubt about it; and at the same time she looks like Kim Kardashian, Megan Fox and a transvestite at the same time. Not Barbara Brylska, of course, but times with morals are no longer the same.

Makeup artists who can do this to a woman are literally worth their weight in gold. It's no joke - with the help of two kilograms of foundation and a spatula, turn the Ryazan simpleton into a Kylie Jenner double. This is real work, work worth a million - rubles and likes. The best of the masters are already touring the CIS and sharing the tricks of transformation from television screens - the ratings of such programs, to the great delight of producers, are growing.

And if I roughly understand why in archival photos all our mothers look a little alike, then why, for example, all our football players are married to twins, I cannot understand. Surely the appearance of this army of clones in the “golden age” of fashion for different types of beauty has some reasonable explanation. Sociologists here could speculate about the desire to be like a successful neighbor, which does not depend on gender and age; biologists - draw an analogy with school animals that are friends only with similar individuals, and peck dissimilar ones and drive them away with sticks; cultural scientists - recall the different aesthetics of the masses and the elites. But these pleasant and clever scientific explanations can hardly be called simple. And the only simple explanation is pleasant: in a time when there is no shortage of porcelain, nails, or eyebrow pencils, individuality is in short supply. But this is exactly what all these shimmers, glitters and beige lipsticks should emphasize. To paint yourself with matte and varnish, sprinkle yourself with pink powder and glitter and finally look the way you want, and not as is customary, you need to not be afraid to be yourself. Alas, this is not taught to Instagram makeup artists at master classes.

Fashion is fashion. Once a supermodel walks down the Parisian catwalk in a couture crop top, the next season, when the trend will descend into the mass market, everyone from high school girls to matrons will have bare midriffs. But you wear a rag and replace it, why do the same with your face? Masha, what’s wrong with your face? Why did all women become the same?

Plastic surgery has now entered the mass market, and cosmetology costs pennies. And if trendsetters slowly come

into herself, and Renata Litvinova, in defiance of the trend, even declares that a “pinned” mouth steals

individuality, then the mass audience gained access to fillers

flirts and puts on a real freak show.

Meeting a girl in the same dress at a party is still a nightmare, but similarly tailored faces are encouraged and even

make beauties part of the same circle. A trend has already emerged: top

sponge - a tight arch, cheekbones, like the eyes of a hammerhead shark, turned into different

sides, a smooth, minuscule forehead, the slightly upturned nose of a twelve-year-old peasant girl - and voila.

There are a lot of memes created on the Internet about the funny trend towards identical faces, but psychologists are sad. They say that the conscious desire to be similar was once given to us by nature. To survive, people gathered in groups and identified “their own”

according to special signs. Today's craving to gather into a herd is a sad wake-up call. From what

have we become so afraid of not being like everyone else, of not being accepted? Why every

a girl sitting on a cosmetic needle is so not friendly with herself that she wants from herself

get rid of?

It wasn't always like this

The peak of fashion for the absence of fashion - for individuality - came

She did NOT erase the very mole that was her calling card.

“The women we wanted,” wrote one of my FB friends

under a photo of such different supermodels of the 90s in a post about modern

cloning. It seems like yes - that decade has been called the sexiest more than once,

and the generation of people whose youth was in the 90s, according to statistics, is still today

has more sex than anyone else.

But if you take the FB friend who said this, put it opposite

him a trio of girls he had dated in the last five years in real life

life, dress them the same and provide them with sunglasses... Believe me, he himself will hardly immediately understand who is who. Because everyone is the same. In other words,

The modern fashion for clones appeared not least thanks to men. It is difficult to track at what point and why the woman turned

into a kind of accessory, and therefore, like any other accessory, it should

Look at the photos of these girls: don’t they look very, very similar, like sisters? But the relationship between them is like that of a Jack Russell terrier and an African hyena! But why do all these beauties (yes, undeniably beauties) look so alike? Chiseled cheekbones, a neat little nose a la Megan Fox, plump lips, long straight hair, the same facial expression...? The trend of “sameness” has become so widespread that many Internet wits are already joking: they say, I went to the toilet, came back and can’t determine which of those girls... is mine?

It's laughable, but it's obvious that in pursuit of stereotypical beauty, young girls reshape their faces, break their psyches, experience stress, suffer from numerous depressive disorders - and all in order to... please men? It turns out that modern representatives of the stronger half prefer... identical dolls? There are more questions than answers! That is why the editors of the site turned to specialists for comprehensive answers: plastic surgeon Sergei Usov and psychologist, life coach Inna Yakovenko.

Sergey Usov, plastic surgeon at the Mediland medical center, 20 years of impeccable reputation in plastic surgery.

If we talk about the trend of “being beautiful,” it was all over the world and at all times. But precisely at the moment when the beauty trend appeared, people with a penchant for excesses in this matter immediately appeared. Sometimes, not only individuals, but also entire cultures were subject to extremes. Surely, each of us has seen African tribes in which women have extremely thin necks due to the constant wearing of neck rings. We are also familiar with representatives of modern European culture with extreme degrees of deformation of the earlobes, skin 100% “clogged” with tattoos and other original tunings of their body. All these people consider the improvements made to be extremely beautiful and attractive. Only this opinion either disagrees with the majority of the surrounding society, or has value in isolated cultures.

The situation with the phenomenon that you invited me to comment on looks completely different.

First of all, I can say, and I believe that most readers will agree with me, that almost every woman would like to look exactly as attractive as the girls in the photographs, and almost every man would be happy to have such a lady next to him. And let those who say that girls lack zest and individual beauty do not lie.

Let me explain why I think so.

Firstly: There are different types of faces, each of which is attractive in its own way. If you look closely at the proposed photos, you can easily notice that 80% of the girls in them have some similarity to each other and not at all due to the gel in their lips, but precisely due to the data that is given to them by nature. This includes the oval of the face, the shape of the eyes, the height of the cheekbones, and so on. Let's now imagine that each of these girls has a hump on the nose 3 - 4 mm high, and the back of the nose is deviated from the axis by half a centimeter. Which reader will say that this improves the aesthetic image of the face and gives it unique individual beauty? It is unlikely that there will be many such opinions. After all, there are people who scar their bodies for the sake of their unique individuality. But the question is, is it beautiful?

Secondly: in addition to the different types of faces, there are common signs that, in the process of evolution, signaled to representatives of the opposite sex that his counterpart was healthy, hardy and could produce fertile offspring. In this aspect, the thickness of the lips, the shape of the eyes, and the height of the cheekbones had their own information value, which was analyzed by the person’s subconscious. Today, in an era when borders between countries are blurred and taboos on marriage between representatives of different races and nationalities are a thing of the past, we can observe plump Negroid lips, Asian cheekbones and European eyes on the face of one person. If you look at girls from such “open” cultures and come across their peers from “closed” worlds, I assure you that in terms of attractiveness you will find the former much more interesting. And always, mulattoes, from mixing the blood of different nationalities, were healthier and more resilient than children in “closed” cultures. There is a completely understandable explanation for this from the point of view of genetics and, undoubtedly, it is reflected in the phenotype (the reflection of a person’s genetic code on his appearance). It is in the phenotype that, judging by the photos presented, you classify as a “trend”.

So, it turns out that women whose appearance has such an “emphasis” are already perceived at a subconscious level by their partners as more attractive. But, unfortunately, nature also has unsuccessful experiments. Genes may not combine in the best way, and instead of full lips and high cheekbones, a girl may end up with a completely different set of characteristics. For example: a short “upturned” nose and thin lips, which do not at all fit into the image that we considered above. And if earlier such women sharply lost in sexual competition and such “unsuccessful” combinations of genes did not continue in the offspring, today almost any woman can be made much more attractive without any radical, as you put it, “reshaping” . And this does not mean that all people should fit into one mold. Not at all. If you look closely at people who are considered very beautiful, you can find signs of facial asymmetry, which, perhaps, emphasizes this beauty, and not vice versa. But protruding and unnaturally inverted ears are certainly not natural beauty and individuality, but a kind of “accident” in the process of conception and development of a child.

Most of these individual deviations can be quite effectively corrected by experienced plastic surgeons. But the situation is much more complicated when a person’s appearance has to be changed radically. More often we are faced with such tasks in cases of real developmental defects or after injuries. In such cases, the term “reshaping” is really acceptable, but there are only a few surgeons and clinics ready to cope with such a task.
Most people prefer to make money by injecting gel into their lips and cheekbones, even in cases where it is not necessary. We started our conversation with the “excesses”. And unlike “templates”, which fit into the concept beautifully, excesses always violate the normal proportions in the human body and, as a rule, are not liked by anyone except the client himself.

The breasts and lips most often undergo such excessive modernization. In our practice, we quite often encounter such not entirely adequate wishes. Without lying, I can say that most clients can be persuaded to make the “correct” decision. However, there are also extremely persistent patients who have made a final decision and go for intervention, regardless of the specialist’s arguments. It is very difficult to achieve an aesthetically satisfactory result and please the patient in such cases. After all, the problem no longer lies in a lack of appearance, but in the psychological aspect of a specific person’s perception of himself and the world around him. Finding a compromise solution in such a situation is truly aerobatics not only in the beauty industry, but also in psychology.

What is the situation like from a psychological point of view? Why are modern girls so eager to become “clones”?

Inna Yakovenko, specialist in life coaching and personal effectiveness coaching.

You don’t need to be a psychologist to diagnose self-doubt, rejection of your own body and lack of self-love for your loved one. The cause of these “illnesses” is, of course, trauma from childhood or the drama of personal relationships. That is why a professional plastic surgery clinic, in addition to consulting with a surgeon, will also refer you to an appointment with a psychologist (let’s agree that now we are NOT talking about cases where a person’s body has been disfigured by illness, accident, or has a congenital/acquired defect; in this case, plastic surgery is salvation, and an experienced doctor is God).

But what pushes girls with quite decent appearance to experiment with pumping up/increasing/reducing, etc.?

If we talk about values, then this is a person’s eternal desire for beauty and well-being. The catalyst for making the decision to change one’s appearance, as at all times, was fashion and the entire industry that supported it, the bearer was public people, the herald was the media. And due to globalization, the conventional standard of beauty has become more widespread than ever. It is obvious that there is another aspect of the topic raised - the lack of one’s own opinion regarding “beautiful”.

Is there a demand for such girls?

Undoubtedly. As my financier friend says: “No demand - no supply. This is the ABC of economics." But what’s interesting: I interviewed a dozen men from different countries, aged from 25 to 40 years old, attractive, smart, well-groomed and, as a result, popular among women, and this is what I found. Almost all of them view such girls as a sexual object, and few would dare to have a long-term or family relationship with them. “In China, a husband sued his wife for not informing her before the wedding about the effect of plastic surgery on her body. I would also apply. It’s one thing to change one’s appearance, another thing to change one’s genotype,” noted a cardiac surgeon friend.

“If we talk about changes related to fashion and the wishes of “male owners,” this only applies to certain strata of society. Their whims are incomprehensible to many - huge houses, motorcades, crocodiles in swimming pools, suturing of the hymen and other “charms” of the “beau monde”. The opportunity to ride in a carriage with a patterned dress among the wretched crowd is no longer there, but the desire to stand out is still alive,” concluded Vlad, an expat in the field of bio-technologies.

Men, who themselves are frequent guests of gyms and plastic surgery clinics, reacted acceptably to relationships with doll-looking girls. For these people, the cult of the body is above all. But they are also opposed to a large number of interventions. I obviously didn’t interview the “daddies”.

As a coach, I note that the end often justifies the means. There are different ways and tools to achieve it.

The desire to be beautiful is eternal, and medicine does not stand still.

And if the desired career requires correction of the nose or the shape of the ears, then only you can decide what to do with it, and what is more important to you. I also do not deny the statistical problem of a shortage of men existing in Ukraine, and, as a consequence, growing female competition.

But appearance serves as a tool of attraction, but not retention. Very soon any beauty becomes commonplace, and even Monica Bellucci once got bored with her husband.

Fashion is a changeable thing and there are already trends towards a preference for naturalness and personal viability. Are you sure that investing in plastic surgery will not eventually lead you to the office of a psychotherapist or psychiatrist?

A lot of inner work is required in order to be confident and at peace with oneself. But the mission is feasible, and care, support, respect and tenderness are also eternal in the list of preferences of men, like beauty.

Be yourself, because you are beautiful!