How to teach your child to clean up after themselves. How to cleverly teach a child to clean up his toys

HOW TO TEACH A CHILD TO CLEAN UP

Every day a hurricane passes through your apartment and its name is your baby? Are you tired of fighting in your family because of the constant chaos? This means that it’s time to teach your child how to clean his room, as well as keep his things in order and clean.

Don't miss the age when children naturally have a desire to clean and improve the space around them. Usually the first period occurs at 2 years - then the baby tries to copy his mother and wants to show his “adulthood” and independence. The second period begins at about 4 years old, the child tries to make his room more beautiful and comfortable. If you find yourself with “training” during this period, then it will fall on favorable soil.
Don’t place much hope on admonitions that a good boy must be neat, and a good girl must be clean. It is unlikely that the child will understand exactly what you want to say and he will immediately develop a passion for cleaning. In addition, by saying that only good children clean their room, you may, without meaning to, let your child understand that if he does not clean, he will be bad, and bad children are not liked.
At first, do not demand much, while cleaning for the baby is an incomprehensible ritual or, at best, an interesting game. Praise your child if all the toys and pencils end up in one box; later you can show how to fold the pencils correctly and how to sort the toys for greater order, etc.

Set an example for your child. Keep the apartment clean, clean up after yourself so that the child can clearly understand what order is.
Explain to your child what cleaning is.
Limit the space for games to the children's room, this will make cleaning issues easier for you. And it will be easier for the baby to learn how to clean the already “mastered” space.
Make it a rule that it should be regular. Agree with your child that every day before bed or before a walk, the toys go to their homes.
Create special places for collecting toys and show them to your child. For example, for designers it could be just a box, for cars it could be a box that you imagine as a garage for all transport, dolls can be placed in a special house, etc. This way it will be clearer to the child what is put where and why.
Try to instill in your child a taste for cleanliness, show him that living in order is pleasant. Do all this calmly, don't shout. Many parents do the opposite: they force their child to clean the room, yell at him, and get angry when he doesn’t listen. As a result, the child develops a hatred of cleaning and order, because he associates them with swearing. In this way, future habits are established.
Don't leave your child alone with the task of cleaning everything up. At first, this will still not bring any results. Help him, encourage him, just be in the room reading a book and keeping an eye on him. If your child already knows what cleaning is and has done it several times, you can say that you leave some of his toy to look after him - a robot, a doll.
Don’t redo what your child has done, and especially don’t do everything for him. Even if he did something wrong or not the way you want, remember that he is learning and he wants to see the results of his work.
Gradually accustom your child to household chores, starting with small ones: watering flowers, wiping off dust, etc. Then cleaning his room will be a common thing for him, and not a strange duty or punishment imposed by his parents.
Remember that you can teach your child to do cleaning regularly and not perceive it as a heavy duty only through playful techniques. At first it will be a game, later the child will understand what it means to live in order and cleanliness, and cleaning will become a habit.
Praise your child for the work done and for his efforts.

Game techniques for cleaning:

Go to the store and invite your child to choose “houses” for toys, explain what they are needed for. Or your child can choose paper or fabric to cover/cover a simple box with. When your child likes the containers themselves, it will be easier and more interesting for him to clean up.
Play "move" with him once. Ask your child to pretend that you have moved into a magical castle and they need to organize their things in their new room. Give your child the opportunity to choose the places where his books and toys will be placed. Guide him. After that, depending on the age of the child, you can hang colorful notes or pictures around the room: on the bookshelf there is a picture of books or a note “For books”, on the clothing shelves there are neatly folded clothes, in the drawer for typewriters there is a picture of a typewriter, etc. d.
Race your child to clean up. Let him clean his part of the room and you clean yours. At first, try to lose to him in this competition.
Discreetly take away the uncleaned things for a few days and say that the Masha doll was not put away in the house yesterday and therefore left, your favorite Winnie the Pooh T-shirt was offended that it was crumpled and thrown away, and also left. Then, of course, return it. Having lost an item and received it back, the baby will learn to value his things more.
Play a treasure hunt. Often, the sight of a colossal mess and the task of “cleaning everything up” frightens kids, because they don’t know how to clean it all up. Do everything gradually. Say that there are treasures buried somewhere in the room, but it is impossible to find them in the rubble! Therefore, first you need to fold your clothes, then lay out your books, drive your cars into the garage, put your dolls to bed, etc. When the room is clean, discreetly place some surprise there for the child. Do not overuse this game so that your child does not associate cleaning with receiving a gift.

Teaching a child to have order in general is not as difficult as it seems. Add a little imagination and love to the process, and cleaning will only be a joy! The baby himself will not notice how this will develop into a daily habit, and he will even like the image of a little master or little hostess!

How to teach a child to put away his things and do it correctly?

Until it's not too late

A mother is the main example for a child. Of course, it’s good if everyone in the family tries to maintain order and does not try to shift household chores onto each other. If the baby watches how his parents carefully keep order, he will also want to take a direct part in this action. When you ask the small owner of such an exemplary house to put away books or cars, you are unlikely to hear violent protests. He will clean everything up with pleasure, and even wash the dishes... But here’s the problem! He certainly doesn't know how to wash dishes! Both at one and two years old, children want to put things in order, but cannot do it the way their parents want. This is where the problems begin. Adults try to avoid broken plates, spilled water from the sink, and take away the child’s right to do housework. After all, he can’t even collect his toys “properly”! But when children grow up, parents return to the issue of order in the house, but with demands and indignation. Be patient and let your child clean while he still wants to.

Is the pile small?

First of all, introduce a simple rule for your child showing when to start cleaning. Let the baby, having played enough with one toy, first put it back in its place, and only after that take another. When there are few toys, there is no problem. In this case, the main thing is not to take the initiative into your own hands, but still give the child the opportunity to put his book on the shelf or put all six cubes in a drawer. Just show the baby how he should act. Explain to him more why he needs to clean, how it is done, why mom always hides clothes in the closet immediately after a walk, etc. However, for a full-fledged game, a child may need a lot of toys. He built a large track out of blocks and a construction set, brought out ten cars for the race, placed spectator toys, set up a car wash with a bowl of water and a gas station. There is no need to limit the baby. Of course, he must enjoy his wealth to the fullest. So, it came to cleaning. There really were a lot of toys scattered on the carpet. The baby may begin to be capricious, afraid that he will not be able to cope with so much work. Help your child divide overwhelming work into simple and manageable tasks. Never redo his work in front of your child. It’s very disappointing when you tried so hard and it’s all in vain. Will you miss the moment of early childhood? At four years old, children often develop a sense of beauty and again want to contribute to creating a pleasant atmosphere in the house. But the habit of observing and maintaining cleanliness, developed in a year or two, has every chance of becoming a character trait.

Game moment

There are two ways to remove toys. It's just boring to put them in boxes or start a special game. You can come up with quite a lot of options. Let it be a competition “Who can collect the most toys?” or preparing for the night ball of fairies and gnomes: the hall should simply sparkle before their appearance. You can try collecting toys and talking for each of them. You can ask on behalf of the doll to put it on a shelf next to the bear, and on behalf of the soldiers, give the command to quickly evacuate into the box. There is also an option for those who like to listen to interesting fairy tales. If your baby has already learned the rules of cleaning and only needs your presence, read a fascinating book to your baby while he cleans the room. If suddenly the baby listens and stops, take a break too. Play a funny song while tidying up, or sing your own invented lines with your baby. After all, blocks can fly into a box like a basketball hoop, and books can be stacked like the rings of a pyramid, from largest to smallest.

Everything is in its place!

In order for a child to easily clean up after himself, you need to think carefully about the place for toys. It is convenient to put soft toys and dolls, books and board games on open shelves, and cubes, soldiers and other small things in boxes or baskets. You can set aside one large box for all cars and one large box for all animals. To prevent the child from getting confused, it would be nice to somehow mark the boxes - glue pictures. This activity itself will already be fun and exciting for the child. Find suitable images, cut them out, and be sure to determine their place for each item together.

Extreme measures

Has the baby grown up a little and suddenly refused to put away his treasures? He is simply testing you: can I not do what my mother says? What happens if I refuse to clean up the mess? Ask if your child needs help and insist. If your baby is stubborn, pause and go about your business. Sooner or later, the stubborn person will need your attention, and then you can remind him of disobedience. There is another effective way. If the baby still goes to bed without putting away the scattered toys, hide them quietly in a secret place, and the next morning tell them that, apparently, they were offended by the child and left. After all, as you know, toys, and some objects, come to life when everyone is sleeping. Read him K.I.'s fairy tales. Chukovsky "Moidodyr" and "Fedorino's grief". Assure your baby that if he firmly decides to pack his things and promises to always put his toys in their place, all his friends will quickly come back because they also miss the baby. If the baby has too many toys and he didn’t even notice they were missing, repeat the “We’re leaving the slob” scenario the next day. There is no need to scold or punish your child for making a mess in the room. Negative emotions are unlikely to lead to a desire to eliminate it. It’s better to praise your child for all his attempts to put your house in order. Words of approval are the most important element in raising a child. If your little one has a hard time cleaning, try the Flower game. Place the daisies “earned” by the baby on a sheet of paper. Each flower is drawn only when the child puts away the toys after playing. When there is a small bouquet on the sheet, for example three daisies, the baby is in for a surprise, but not material: a game with dad, permission to play on the computer, etc.

Faktrum publishes a post by Ruth Sucup, a guru of order and smart spending, New York Times columnist, writer, wife and mother of two children. Ruth runs her own blog dedicated to order: order in the head, in finances, in relationships and... in children's rooms! So…

Be prepared for tears, threats, bargaining, excuses, demands for something in return and promises to do everything later. More than once you will want to throw out the white flag and put the toys on the shelves yourself. I've lost count of how often my husband - our family peacemaker - has asked if it's all really worth it. “They are just children - one is 3, the other is 6. Don’t you think that you are asking too much of them?”

But I didn't give up. If I don't expect more from them, who will? Sooner or later my children will thank me for this. That's how I reasoned.

The battle continued for several months. Several times I spent literally several hours to achieve my goal. But now, almost a year later, I know that I can just say, “Please clean your room,” and my request will be granted. From all this, I myself learned several lessons.

Set an example

It would be strange to expect cleanliness from a child if I myself did not make an effort to keep the house clean. Well, of course, the house is not always in perfect order, but I regularly spend enough time to keep it clean and comfortable. My girls can see me cleaning almost every day, and sometimes they even help me with it. Our rule is to make sure that every morning begins with order in the apartment.

Be consistent

Often in the evening we are so tired that we have no energy left to clean. But every morning we start by cleaning up after ourselves. Even on those days when we don’t feel like it at all. Even if we have a lot of other things to do. Even if there is so much going on around you. For better or worse, it has already become a habit among us. I think someday my girls will do this without thinking. For now, however, we need to remind them. But here's what's important: WE start the day with cleaning. They and I. This is the key to solving the problem. It would be easier for me to clean everything myself while they watched TV. But I never do their work for them.

Be decisive

This means that the answer “No” will not be accepted under any circumstances. Every day my children learn to accept one simple thing - while they are children, they must obey me. They understand that I expect them to do what I asked them to do, no more and no less. The first time, without disputes, complaints or excuses. We have no democracy here, no negotiations.

Get rid of unnecessary things

Try putting some of their toys away - in the attic, in the garage... - like I did last summer. You can’t imagine how much easier life became for the children themselves after that. But children are like magnets, they seem to attract new toys, parts, pieces of paper, and all this accumulates again and again. Therefore, when throwing away unnecessary things, it is useful to be a little cynical. All sorts of papers and debris should be disposed of almost immediately (when children do not see it).

Putting things away should be easy

Cleaning is very easy for my girls because everything in their room has its own home. Clothes hang low enough that they can hang them themselves, toys and games are each “assigned” to their own shelf or box.

Let it be fun

I admit, cleaning is not always fun. But you need to try to make the process captivate the children. For example, arrange a competition: who can clean up the fastest - the children in their room, or the mother in the rest of the apartment. Or turn on music so you can collect toys and dance.

Children do not always understand what adults want from them. Explain what you mean when you ask to clean up. I showed my daughters how to properly hang clothes, fold pajamas, and how to check if things are dirty. Together we learned to “scan” the room in search of toys lying around in the corners, to check if anything had rolled under the bed. I showed them where to put garbage and dirty dishes that should not be left in their room. However, they still resist my requests to make the bed.

Be tactful

Never expect children to be in perfect order. Even if they tried really hard. When I ask them to do something, I expect them to make every effort to do it, but the result may not be the same as if I did it myself. On the contrary, if on some day they cleaned up better than usual, they should be praised for this.

Any mother dreams of raising her daughter to be a real housewife, and her son to be a neat and clean person. But how to teach a child to be tidy if the baby likes to throw toys around and doesn’t even think about cleaning up after himself?

This question, of course, is not easy, but it is worth considering that all children are a little sloppy. How could it be otherwise? Playing in the sandbox, drawing, noisy home entertainment - all this requires enormous energy expenditure and absorbs all attention. A child who is captivated by the game is not able to keep order. Nevertheless, it is possible to make a clean girl out of a baby (in the good sense of the word). How? Read on.

Where to begin?

First of all, it is worth saying that young children are very susceptible to the influence of their parents. At the age of 3-4 years, kids tend to copy mom and dad in almost everything. For them, parents are an unquestioned authority, a role model, an ideal. This should be used to the maximum if you want to accustom your baby to cleanliness and order.

Use your example to inspire your child to clean. Together, put things in their places, wash the dishes, put away toys after noisy games. With an older child, you can even wash the floor or vacuum the carpets.

Remember that if you yourself do not like cleanliness and do not strive to maintain it, it is at least unfair to demand this from your baby.

You can also give the following advice: never reprimand your child if he does something wrong, and encourage any initiative (washing dishes, wiping dust) with praise and delight.

You can often see the following picture: a little daughter tries to wash the dishes herself, but it turns out badly - there is coffee residue left somewhere on the cup, foam has not been washed off the plate somewhere, the floor around is splashed with water. Mom, wanting to do everything faster and more accurately, takes the sponge from her daughter and washes the dishes herself. This behavior is fundamentally wrong. It will only discourage the baby from getting involved in cleaning in the future.

Teaching order to a 2-3 year old child

It is at this age that it is advisable to begin teaching cleanliness, since for children the parental word still remains the law. It is very easy to instill good habits and useful skills at 2-4 years of age.

1. Encourage your child's initiative. This has already been mentioned above. It only remains to add that any attempt by your child to help you with the housework should not go unnoticed. At first, you shouldn’t even try to explain to your baby what he’s doing wrong.
2. Don't give your little one difficult tasks. It’s clear that cleaning the floor is an impossible task for a two-year-old toddler, but he can handle cleaning the toys in his room without difficulty. The main thing is to tell your child in advance (or better yet, show him) what should be where.
3. Teach order in a playful way. “Build” a house for cars, make a “kindergarten for dolls.” Bring a fairy tale into everyday life, and then it will be much more interesting for your little one to keep things clean.

Teaching order to a 5-8 year old child

If you laid a “good foundation” in early childhood, then at the age of 5-8 the baby will consciously begin to strive for cleanliness and order. He already knows how to put away toys, wipe dust, wash dishes, it’s time to move on to more complex tasks.

But since at this age children no longer consider cleaning an entertaining activity, conflicts may arise when the child refuses to perform one or another duty around the house. Don't get annoyed, but follow the rules below.

Make a list. Write down on a piece of paper what your child can do. Sample to-do list for children 5-8 years old:

• wash the dishes;
• remove toys;
• dust your room;
• make the bed;
• wipe the bathroom mirror;
• clear the table after dinner;
• change the litter in the cat's litter box/sawdust in the rodent's cage;
• To water flowers;
• take out the trash.

Don't burden your child with work. Remember that the child is not a housekeeper or a cleaner. There is no need to constantly demand help from him in household chores. It’s better to give him several basic tasks that he must complete during the day, when he has time for this.

Never do your child's work. If he should dust but doesn't, remind him often of his responsibilities, but don't do it all yourself.

We teach order to a child aged 9-14 years

All children at this age are rude and picky. Cleaning is clearly not something they would like to do. Nevertheless, learning to order is possible even at this difficult age.

Let's make a reservation right away that it is too late to START accustoming a child to order at this age. Theoretically this is possible, but in practice the result is not always successful. Children, on principle, do not want to clean, even if they see that cleaning is really required.

1. Define the task clearly. Keep your emotions and subjective assessments to yourself. The child must receive clear instructions for action. For example, instead of “Even a dog won’t eat from such a dirty floor!” say “The floor should be cleaned by this evening.”
2. Motivate. Make the child want to clean up himself. Perhaps he himself will get tired of living in a dirty room, but is it really worth waiting for this moment? It’s better to create comfortable conditions for him to clean (while washing dishes, he can listen to music; while wiping dust, he can watch TV).
3. Don't ridicule or teach. What teenagers don't like most is being made out to be small and stupid.

A radical method of teaching order

Not all psychologists will agree with this method. But it really works!

If a child does not want to “understand” ordinary persuasion and requests, many mothers decide to take extreme measures. They set a condition: if you don’t put things away in your room, then everything that is out of place will end up in the trash can. Most children think it's a bluff, but the important thing here is to actually fulfill your promise. Even if we are talking about quite expensive things. Next time, your child will think three times before leaving a mess in the room.

• From childhood, instill in your child a sense of responsibility for cleanliness, as well as respect for the work of others. Agree, if the baby swept the floor and spent a lot of effort on it, he is unlikely to want the floor to be dirty with dirty shoes.
• Don’t act alone - involve your family in instilling in your child a love of cleanliness. And, on the contrary, do not let grandmothers do everything for the child.
• Let everyone in the family have their own responsibilities at home. The child should not have a question: why should I clean, but dad doesn’t do anything?
• The biggest mistake parents make is punishing them for untidy toys. This method will not give anything, much less teach the baby to be in order.

Conclusion

Start teaching your children order as early as possible. At 2-3 years old, the ideal age for training comes from a psychological point of view. Do not punish your child, but praise him for any initiative. And, of course, try to be a role model for him.

Do you know a joke? The best alarm clock is children. Start it once and...

And, as an option, the duration of impeccable order in your home begins to be counted in a matter of minutes. But if you let things take their course, and if you gradually accustom them to order, you will be able to significantly not only save time and nerves, but also get pleasure. Yes, yes, specifically from cleaning, and it’s up to you to choose which method or combination of methods is right for you.

Method #1 Personal example is better than any words!

No one has yet come up with a more effective way than personal example. Little imitators do not need to be persuaded; the kids themselves actively wield a broom, wipe off the dust with a rag or reach for a vacuum cleaner. That's what mom does. Show your child by example how to clean properly, where to put things in order, where to hang things, how to sort toys into boxes and put books on shelves. Even if you are tired and not in the mood at the time of cleaning, do not show it to your baby. Negative emotions in the baby’s subconscious will be superimposed on the process and he will think that cleaning “makes mom angry.” Keep things light, smile at your helper, hum a song together, or play some fun music in the background.

When starting to clean the nursery, do not criticize your child for “the mess he made here” and “the rubbish he keeps here.” He can say the same about the contents of your closet or makeup bag. Your concepts of convenience, beauty and usefulness of things are different, so let your child lead the process.

If a child has built a railway or a knight's castle for half a room, do not demand that it all be removed immediately. Believe me, he put no less effort and effort into his creative process than you put into a cooked dinner or an ironed pile of laundry.

Always put things in order so that it is pleasant and cozy to be in the house, and not because “guests will come.” Otherwise, the next time you clean, you will suddenly hear the question: “Mom, why are we cleaning? Will someone come to visit us today?

Method 2. We need a plan!

The call to “quickly clean everything up” does not carry any meaning for the child. He is simply not able to follow the scope of your thoughts. It is much more effective to make a plan and clearly set tasks. Put books on shelves, put toys in drawers, wipe the table with a cloth, water the flowers. Select tasks according to the child's age. If the child already reads, write a list of tasks on a sheet of paper; if not, draw schematic drawings. Give your child only one task at a time, and be sure to praise him after each completed task. At the end of cleaning, be sure to reward yourself and your baby with a prize: a delicious dessert, watching a cartoon together, a game or a walk.

Method 3. No matter how hard you compact the trash can, you still have to take it out!

It would be nice if the child came to such a simple conclusion on his own. After playing, drawing, reading, walking - toys, books, accessories, clothes need to be put back in place. Explain and show that it is better to put such a little order right away than to spend a long time putting things in their places and putting away scattered things on the shelves.

Create a daily evening ritual of putting toys away. But not when it’s time to sleep, but before dinner or watching a cartoon at night. It's time for toys to go to bed too, and no one wants to lie on the floor all night.

This small cleaning ritual should become a daily routine. When an action is repeated regularly, regardless of any accompanying conditions, it becomes a habit and becomes part of the daily routine. The child understands that cleaning becomes an unchanging item in the daily and weekly program, and it cannot be avoided, so he accepts your rules of the game. The most important thing here is not to deviate from the joint agreement. If at first you at least once allow the child to “put away the toys in the morning,” be prepared for frequent repetition of this situation and daily persuasion and prodding. Be consistent.

Method 4. More fun together!

Give your child cleaning tasks in a playful way. Preschoolers will be happy to support your game. Save toys from an evil sorcerer who goes out hunting at night or arrange a competition to see who can quickly collect stuffed animals in a box house or drive cars into the garage. When you don’t just help your child clean or clean for him, but when you are nearby, supporting him, cooperating and encouraging him, it creates that very trusting and friendly environment. This is very important for a child.

If your child loves it when you read to him, read a book to him while he arranges the soldiers on the shelf or puts the scattered pieces of the construction set in the box. One day the cleaning will end at the most interesting place, which will encourage the baby to continue reading on his own. This method will instill in the child not only a love of cleaning, but also.

Method 5. Every blackbird know its nest!

Every toy, every book should have its place. Find a place for new things and gifts right away and agree on it. Sometimes the cause of clutter is simply a lack of space for things. The baby has nowhere to put them, so the room looks cluttered and untidy.

Think about this when planning your nursery and arranging your child's space. He needs to know where to put dirty laundry, where to throw garbage, he needs boxes and drawers for toys, shelves for books and art supplies. In this case, if possible, the room should be spacious and not cluttered. It is ideal when toy boxes in the shape of animals or cartoon characters are not only functional, but also become interior decoration. There are a variety of boxes and containers for children's rooms, so beautiful that the baby himself will want to immediately put all his toys there. Buy for your baby a small trash can for paper and scraps, bright boxes for small items and “holders” for cartoon discs, hang the shelves at a level convenient for the child and not for you, check if there is enough space in the closet, teach how to use hangers for clothes. It doesn’t have to take a lot of money to arrange a room to suit your child’s taste; look for coupons and discounts on the Internet, use promotional code sites, for example, Cuponation offers coupons for stores and brands such as Detsky Mir, Dochki Sonochki, Kinderly, My Toys. Many large trading platforms organize promotions and sales, for example, Aliexpress.

Do not forget to conduct an audit in the nursery from time to time. Collect the toys that the child does not play with and put them away; in a few months they will be received with a bang, as if they were new. Those toys that the baby has “grown out of” can be given to younger children, and broken ones can be completely thrown away if they cannot be repaired.

Method 6. Bonus!

No matter how irritated you are by the constant chaos in the nursery, do not take your dissatisfaction out on your child. Always remember that no one is perfect, and above all, let your child understand that he is more important to you than order and cleanliness. Just because you're angry about toys being thrown around doesn't mean you've stopped loving him. Don't let clutter cause quarrels and ruin your mood. Just remember that the baby himself will not learn to keep himself and the surrounding space in order if you do not help and set an example for him.

Let's summarize the same what not to do when trying to teach a child order:

1. Do not give your child many tasks at once, dose out the information.
2. If you are unhappy with your child's actions, always clearly explain what exactly and how this can be corrected.
3. Never entrust your child with cleaning as a punishment, as this will only instill in him a persistent negative attitude towards this process.
4. If you yourself are not particularly fond of order and rarely clear away the accumulated rubble in bedside tables, on shelves and window sills, then you should not demand this from your child. Instill cleanliness by personal example.
5. Don't tell your child that cleaning the nursery is his responsibility. It is better to emphasize that this is much needed “help” that will always be highly appreciated.

Easy cleaning and good mood!