A story about how a husband prepared a surprise for his wife!!! (for those who want to laugh). Jokes - pictures, video jokes, funny stories and anecdotes

"After being told that my balls resembled the appearance of an old Rastafarian, I decided to take the plunge and buy this gel because previous shaving attempts had failed special success, besides, I almost killed my back trying to reach
especially hard to reach places. I'm a bit of a romantic, so I decided to do this for my wife's birthday - like another gift. I ordered it in advance. Since I work on the North Sea, I considered myself a tough guy and thought that previous reviews were written
some pathetic office rats... oh my fellow sufferers, how wrong I was. I waited until my other half went to bed and, hinting at a special surprise, I went to the toilet. At first everything went fine. I applied the gel to the desired areas and waited. And he waited very quickly. At first I felt a warmth, which after a few seconds was replaced by a strong burning sensation and a feeling that I can only compare to the feeling when they sharply pull barbed wire panties on you, trying to throw you up to the ceiling. Until this evening, I was not too religious, but at that moment I could believe in any god, if only he would save me from the terrible burning around the shithole and the complete destruction of the sausage and two eggs. Trying not to bite through lower lip, I tried to wash off the gel in the sink, but I only managed to push a clump of hair into the hole. Through a curtain of tears, I got out of the toilet and went to the kitchen. I could no longer walk in the kitchen, so I crawled the last meters to the refrigerator. Having rolled out the bottom chamber of the refrigerator, I found a tub of ice cream there, tore off the lid and stuck it under me. The relief was fantastic, but short-lived, because the ice cream quickly melted and the hellish burning sensation returned. - The bath was quite small, so I couldn’t help the ass hole. I began to rummage through the box, hoping to find at least something - there were already so many tears in my eyes that I could see little. I grabbed the bag, which I later learned contained frozen bean sprouts, and tore it open, trying to do it as quietly as possible. I grabbed a few sprouts and tried unsuccessfully to squeeze them between my buttocks. This did not help - the gel, along the way, penetrated into the rectum, and now it seemed to be working there jet engine. I hope I never dream of having a gay snowman in the kitchen again - do you understand how low I was willing to stoop to relieve the pain? The only solution that my pain-crazed brain came up with was to carefully push one sprout into a place where no other plant had sprouted before. Unfortunately, after hearing strange groans from the kitchen, my wife decided to get up and find out what was going on. She was greeted by a stunning sight: I was lying on the floor, with strawberry ice cream dripping from my ass, and stuffing beans into myself with the words “Oh, how good.” This undoubtedly shocked her and she screamed in horror. I didn’t hear her come in, so I got scared myself, a spasm squeezed my guts, and the sprout flew out in her direction at considerable speed. Yes, I understand that a bean sprout being farted in her direction at twelve at night is not exactly the surprise she was counting on, and the next day the children had to explain for a long time what happened to the ice cream... in general, thanks Veet you can lose not only your body hair, but also your dignity and self-respect))

Overheardtoday at 15:32
?Male review of Veet depilatory gel. (Spelling and punctuation unchanged)

“After being told that my balls resembled the appearance of an old Rastafarian, I decided to take the plunge and buy this gel, because previous attempts at shaving were not very successful, and besides, I almost killed my back trying to reach especially hard to reach places.

I'm a bit of a romantic, so I decided to do this for my wife's birthday - like another gift. I ordered it in advance. Since I work on the North Sea, I considered myself a tough guy and thought that the previous reviews were written by some pathetic office rats...

oh, my fellow sufferers, how wrong I was. I waited until my other half went to bed and, hinting at a special surprise, I went to the toilet. At first everything went fine. I applied the gel to the desired areas and waited. And he waited very quickly. At first I felt a warmth, which after a few seconds was replaced by a strong burning sensation and a feeling that I can only compare to the feeling when they sharply pull barbed wire panties on you, trying to throw you up to the ceiling. Until this evening, I was not too religious, but at that moment I could believe in any god, if only he would save me from the terrible burning around the shithole and the complete destruction of the sausage and two eggs. Trying not to bite through my lower lip, I tried to rinse off the gel in the sink, but all I could do was get a clump of hair into the hole.

Through a curtain of tears, I got out of the toilet and went to the kitchen. I could no longer walk in the kitchen, so I crawled the last meters to the refrigerator. Having rolled out the bottom chamber of the refrigerator, I found a tub of ice cream there, tore off the lid and stuck it under me. The relief was fantastic, but short-lived, because the ice cream quickly melted and the hellish burning sensation returned. - The bath was quite small, so I couldn’t help the ass hole.

I began to rummage through the box, hoping to find at least something - there were already so many tears in my eyes that I could see little. I grabbed the bag, which I later learned contained frozen bean sprouts, and tore it open, trying to do it as quietly as possible. I grabbed a few sprouts and tried unsuccessfully to squeeze them between my buttocks. This did not help - the gel, along the way, penetrated into the rectum, and now it was as if a jet engine was working there. I hope I never dream of having a gay snowman in the kitchen again - do you understand how low I was willing to stoop to relieve the pain? The only solution that my pain-crazed brain came up with was to carefully push one sprout into a place where no other plant had sprouted before. Unfortunately, after hearing strange groans from the kitchen, my wife decided to get up and find out what was going on. She was greeted by a stunning sight: I was lying on the floor, with strawberry ice cream dripping from my ass, and stuffing beans into myself with the words “Oh, how good.”

This undoubtedly shocked her and she screamed in horror. I didn’t hear her come in, so I got scared myself, a spasm squeezed my guts, and the sprout flew out in her direction at considerable speed. Yes, I understand that a bean sprout being farted in her direction at twelve at night is not quite the surprise she was counting on, and the next day the children had to explain for a long time what happened to the ice cream... in general, thanks to Veet you can lose not only body hair, but also dignity and self-respect))

Bathroom of a very hairy man
After being told that my balls looked like an old Rastafarian, I decided to take the plunge and buy this depilatory gel because previous shaving attempts had not been particularly successful, plus I almost killed my back trying to get them. and reach especially hard-to-reach places.

I'm a little romantic, so I decided to do this for my wife's birthday - like another gift. I ordered the gel in advance. Since I work on the North Sea, I considered myself a tough guy and thought that previous reviews of the gel were written by some pathetic office rats. Oh, my fellow sufferers, how wrong I was.

I waited until my other half went to bed and, hinting at a special surprise, went to the toilet. At first everything went fine. I applied the gel to the desired areas and waited. And he waited very quickly.

At first I felt a warmth, which after a few seconds was replaced by a strong burning sensation and a feeling that I can only compare to the feeling when they sharply pull barbed wire panties on you, trying to throw you up to the ceiling. Until this evening, I was not too religious, but at that moment I could believe in any god, if only he would save me from the terrible burning around the shithole and the complete destruction of the sausage and two eggs. Trying not to bite through my lower lip, I tried to rinse off the gel in the sink, but all I could do was get a clump of hair into the hole.

Through a curtain of tears, I got out of the toilet and went to the kitchen. I could no longer walk in the kitchen, so I crawled the last meters to the refrigerator. Having rolled out the lower chamber from the refrigerator, I found a tub of ice cream there, tore off the lid from it and stuck it under myself. The relief was fantastic, but short-lived, because the ice cream quickly melted and the hellish burning sensation returned.

The bath was quite small, so I couldn’t help the asshole. Then I started rummaging through the box, hoping to find at least something; there were already so many tears in my eyes that I couldn’t see much. I grabbed the bag, which I later learned contained frozen bean sprouts, and tore it open, trying to do it as quietly as possible. He grabbed a few sprouts and tried unsuccessfully to squeeze them between his buttocks. This did not help, the gel, along the way, penetrated into the rectum, and now it was as if a jet engine was working there.

I hope I never dream of having a gay snowman in the kitchen again - do you understand how low I was willing to stoop to relieve the pain? The only solution that my pain-crazed brain came up with was to carefully insert one bean sprout into a place where no plant had yet sprouted.

Unfortunately, after hearing strange groans from the kitchen, my wife decided to get up and find out what was going on. She was greeted by a stunning sight: I was lying on the floor, with strawberry ice cream dripping from my ass, and stuffing beans into myself with the words “Oh, how good.” This undoubtedly shocked her and she screamed in horror. I didn’t hear her come in, so I got scared myself, a spasm squeezed my intestines and I farted, while the sprout flew out in her direction at considerable speed.

Yes, I understand that a bean sprout being farted in her direction at twelve at night is not exactly the surprise she was counting on, and the next day the children had to explain for a long time what happened to the ice cream... in general, thanks gel can cause you to lose not only your body hair, but also your dignity and self-respect in your family!

Stories from life, as they say, are both laughter and sin.
About female depilation:
The night of love is coming =) I decided to get ready during the day, waxing, legs and “everything is in the same place =)” I went and bought some wax strips"Vit" are green. Somehow they were also on sale, I was delighted and bought 3 packs. I think, Oh, this will be enough for a long time... I sat down in the bathroom, got ready, gathered my courage... well, everything was as per the instructions: warm it up in your palms, tear one from the other and glue it to the right place. I started with the bikini area, damn... I glued it... I waited... I waited some more... Well, I pulled it!... I was surprised, why the hell didn’t it hurt?? I look at the strip, it’s transparent (reminds me of green wax).. .I look at my pussy, and all the wax remains there... Fuck it, what should I do!! panic! It can’t be wiped off with napkins, it’s frozen like glue... What to do? Soap, water, Toothbrush I used it... it doesn’t help at all, damn it, sticky pussy! I suffered until the evening, shaved it off with a razor, took disposable ones, changed 7 pieces, the wax became clogged. As a result, I have a green sticky pussy. I didn’t refuse sex, I decided it was dark, he wouldn’t notice, and so as not to stick to me, we’d be in the DOGI position... in a fit of passion, I still found myself sitting face to face... and fuck, he started screaming, there were tears swollen... I look at my pubis, and there is a bush full of his hair...
P.S. Why should we girls suffer alone?!? =)))

About men's hair removal:
Review of men's depilatory gel. After being told that my balls looked like an old Rastafarian, I decided to take the plunge and buy this depilatory gel because previous shaving attempts had not been particularly successful, plus I almost killed my back trying to get them. and reach especially hard-to-reach places. I'm a bit of a romantic, so I decided to do this for my wife's birthday - like another gift. I ordered the gel in advance. Since I work on the North Sea, I considered myself a tough guy and thought that the previous reviews of the gel were written by some pathetic office rats... oh my fellow sufferers, how wrong I was. I waited until my other half went to bed and, hinting at a special surprise, I went to the toilet. At first everything went fine. I applied the gel to the desired areas and waited. And he waited very quickly. At first I felt warmth, which after a few seconds was replaced by the strongest burning sensation and feeling that I can
It can only be compared to the feeling of someone sharply pulling barbed wire panties over you, trying to throw you up to the ceiling. Until this evening, I was not too religious, but at that moment I could believe in any god, if only he would save me from the terrible burning around the shithole and the complete destruction of the sausage and two eggs. Trying not to bite through my lower lip, I tried to rinse off the gel in the sink, but all I could do was get a clump of hair into the hole. Through a curtain of tears, I got out of the toilet and went to the kitchen. I could no longer walk in the kitchen, so I crawled the last meters to the refrigerator. Having rolled out the bottom chamber of the refrigerator, I found a tub of ice cream there, tore off the lid and stuck it under me. The relief was fantastic, but short-lived because the ice cream was fast
melted, and the hellish burning returned. The bath was quite small, so I couldn’t help the asshole. I started rummaging through the box, hoping to find at least something - there were already so many tears in my eyes that I couldn’t see much. I grabbed the bag, which I later learned contained frozen bean sprouts, and tore it open, trying to do it as quietly as possible. I grabbed a few sprouts and tried unsuccessfully to squeeze them between my buttocks. This did not help - the gel, along the way, penetrated into the rectum, and now it was as if a jet engine was working there. I hope I never again dream of having a gay snowman in the kitchen - do you understand how low I was willing to stoop to relieve the pain? The only solution my pain-crazed brain came up with was to carefully push one bean sprout into a place where no plant had yet sprung. Unfortunately, after hearing strange groans from the kitchen, my wife decided to get up and find out what was going on. She was greeted by a stunning sight: I was lying on the floor, with strawberry ice cream dripping from my ass, and stuffing beans into myself with the words “Oh, how good.” This undoubtedly shocked her and she screamed in horror. I didn’t hear her come in, so I got scared myself, a spasm squeezed my intestines, and I farted, while the sprout flew out in her direction at considerable speed. Yes, I understand that a bean sprout being farted in her direction at twelve at night is not exactly the surprise she was counting on, and the next day the children had to explain for a long time what happened to the ice cream..... in general , thanks to the gel, you can lose not only body hair, but also dignity and self-respect.

49 201 (+18)

“After being told that my balls resembled the appearance of an old Rastafarian, I decided to take the plunge and buy this gel, because previous attempts at shaving were not very successful, and besides, I almost killed my back trying to reach especially hard to reach places.

I'm a bit of a romantic, so I decided to do this for my wife's birthday - like another gift. I ordered it in advance. Since I work on the North Sea, I considered myself a tough guy and thought that previous reviews were written

some pathetic office rats... oh my fellow sufferers, how wrong I was. I waited until my other half went to bed and, hinting at a special surprise, I went to the toilet. At first everything went fine. I applied the gel to the desired areas and waited. And he waited very quickly. At first I felt a warmth, which after a few seconds was replaced by a strong burning sensation and a feeling that I can only compare to the feeling when they sharply pull barbed wire panties on you, trying to throw you up to the ceiling. Until this evening, I was not too religious, but at that moment I could believe in any god, if only he would save me from the terrible burning around the shithole and the complete destruction of the sausage and two eggs. Trying not to bite through my lower lip, I tried to rinse off the gel in the sink, but all I could do was get a clump of hair into the hole. Through a curtain of tears, I got out of the toilet and went to the kitchen. I could no longer walk in the kitchen, so I crawled the last meters to the refrigerator. Having rolled out the bottom chamber of the refrigerator, I found a tub of ice cream there, tore off the lid and stuck it under me. The relief was fantastic, but short-lived because the ice cream was fast

melted, and the hellish burning returned. - The bath was quite small, so I couldn’t help the ass hole. I began to rummage through the box, hoping to find at least something - there were already so many tears in my eyes that I could see little. I grabbed the bag, which I later learned contained frozen bean sprouts, and tore it open, trying to do it as quietly as possible. I grabbed a few sprouts and had no luck

tried to squeeze them between his buttocks. This did not help - the gel, along the way, penetrated into the rectum, and now it seemed to be working there

jet engine. I hope I never dream of having a gay snowman in the kitchen again - do you understand how low I was willing to stoop to relieve the pain? The only solution that my pain-crazed brain came up with was to carefully push one sprout into a place where no other plant had sprouted before. Unfortunately, after hearing strange groans from the kitchen, my wife decided to get up and find out what was going on. She was greeted by a stunning sight: I was lying on the floor, with strawberry ice cream dripping from my ass, and stuffing beans into myself with the words “Oh, how good.” This undoubtedly shocked her and she screamed in horror. I didn’t hear her come in, so I got scared myself, a spasm squeezed my guts, and the sprout flew out in her direction at considerable speed. Yes, I understand that a bean sprout being farted in her direction at twelve at night is not quite the surprise she was counting on, and the next day the children had to explain for a long time what happened to the ice cream... in general, thanks to Veet you can lose not only body hair, but also dignity and self-respect))